First of all, hello to everybody. I hope everything's alright with this thread now. Would someone mind feedbacking this essay? Thanks a lot!
What motivates me to apply to a university 5000 miles away from home is the possibility of enriching my college experience by learning and researching about diverse areas in a highly intellectual environment. The compulsory restriction to studying only the subjects related to a certain major in Brazilian colleges is a bit frustrating. Such rigidity made me struggle to find something I liked throughoutly. Law? Engineering? History? Cooking? Whatever those National Geographic documentarists who travel the world (or maybe Indiana Jones) had done? Eventually, I settled down with Economics. But now, I see all the doors the University of Chicago opened, and I feel tempted to nosily consider what else can I do. It is comforting to know that, wherever I end up, the university's top-notch liberal and holistic approach towards education allows me to combine every single aspect out of the areas I enjoy into a preciously unique education.
The tools are many: the broad common core curriculum, which provides a solid academic basis, world-level courses and facilities, and a faculty whose brilliance can be seen at the many Nobel Prizes collected. The current Department of Economics faculty features no less than 5 laureates. I also highly esteem the innumerous options of study-abroad programmes, which will surely allow me to shape a more fundamented, practic and critical world view; the interesting Office of Multicultural Student Affairs, where I will be able to make contact with diametrically different backgrounds. And, last but not least, the diverse opportunities for student-led community service, offered through organizations such as the UCSC (University Community Service Center) and the Chicago Studies department, not only because of its magnanimous ethical aspects, but also because social and sustainable business, an extremely exciting on-the-rise activity whose broad proposal consists of linking economic development, social welfare and environmental sustainability, is an area I'm very keen on. I live on a city which, just like the Hyde Park area, faces serious issues, like poverty and violence. And I am sure that a lot of things that I will learn in the Windy City can be used here in Rio de Janeiro.
I see in the University of Chicago an exceptional institution, dedicated to the convergence of different areas of human knowledge and a world reference when it comes to liberal education. American philosopher Will Durant would say it is where civilization is transmitted. I dare to complement him: it is where education is improved. A vibrant center where interests give birth to new ideas, thoughts are transformed into reality and different parts of the world meet and interact. We ourselves are improved. More than a passport to one of the world's most important universities, an admission to Chicago is an invitation to change; and I would delightfully accept it.
What motivates me to leave Brazil and pursue college education 5000 miles away from home is the incredible opportunity of studying and learning about so many diverse places . Down here, the system is a bit more rigid, and I struggled to find something I throughoutly liked.I don't understand how the rigid structure of home affects your ability to choose? Economics, law, engineering, history, cooking... all seemed to fit me perfectly, and it took me a while to settle down with the first option. And, now, again, I stand undecided: the possibility of picking up everything I enjoy in these areas and obtaining a preciously unique education is indeed seducing. After all, if I enjoy Middle Ages and Macroeconomics so much, why should I refrain from studying both? I can almost see myself in the Old World, conducting researches about ancient Mediterranean trade routes with my charming Italian colleague.
The paragraph above confuses me. As your first paragraph, you might want to mention University of Chicago. You say you are undecided, but then say moving is seducing and you don't say what is holding you back. When you mention you enjoy middle ages and macroeconomics, it might be a good time to mention that University of Chicago can give you that opportunity. I would also hold off on talking about studying abroad, that is what i assume you are talking about with the "old world," and "italian colleague." Right now it sounds as if you are confused on where Chicago really is.
What comforts me is that, even if I end up forgoing long expeditions with Vittoria, the U of C Spell out University of Chicago the first time you mention it offers a top-notch liberal and holistic approach towards education, allowing me to experience a myriad of new things. Take, for instance, the broad common core curriculum, which provides a solid academic basis, world-level courses and facilities, a brilliant faculty, whose global renownreputation can be demonstrated through its many Nobel Prizes in several areas.Maybe point out an example that you find most impressive, try to make it fairly current
New paragraph I also highly esteem the innumerous options of study-abroad programmes, which will surely allow me to shape a more fundamented, practic and critical world view; the interesting Office of Multicultural Student Affairs, where I will be able to make contact with diametrically different backgrounds (who knows, maybe a sushi course at OMSAwrite out acronyms the first time you use them could be an appropriate debut to a glorious chef career).Run-onAlso the diverse opportunities for student-led community service, offered through organizations such as the spell out UCSC and the Chicago Studies department, not only because of its magnanimous ethical aspects, but also because social business is an area I'm very keen onYou really should elaborate on this, they want to know why chicago because they want to know what you are interested in and how Chicago is the right place for you to do that . I live on a city where, just like the Hyde Park area, violence is a serious issue, and I am sure that a lot of things that I may learn in Chicago can be used here in Rio de Janeiro.
The city of Chicago itself is an important part of the learning experience. Despite considering myself an "urbanite", who feels at home in such big metropolises, the cultural diversity and liveliness inherent to the Windy City is overwhelming. The University's student community itself features such variety and spirit, as noticed on its several heterogeneous groups, feeding undergraduates from a "Chicago man/woman" archetype, traditional outings at orientation weeks, and - why not - even at some articulately-written essay prompts at the application supplement, their creation. I see a group who works hard to make the U of C an institution whose excellence and worldwide importance is incontestable, but, still, find plenty of time to chat, hit the town, have fun.
I see in the University of Chicago an exceptional institution, dedicated to the convergence of different areas of human knowledge and a reference when it comes to liberal education in the United Statesslightly awkward wording . American philosopher Will Durant would say it is where civilization is transmitted; make sure to put that in quotes I dare to complement him: it is where itelaborate on it" is improved. A vibrant center where interests give birth to new ideas, thoughts are transformed into reality and different parts of the world meet and interactI love this sentence! . We ourselves are improved. More than a passport to one of the world's most important universities, an admission to Chicago is an invitation to change; and I would delightfully accept it.
Amazing ending!
Hope that helped! Take a look at my essays if you can.
