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'most of my life in Colombia' - a significant experience, achievement, risk


diegorivero412 2 / 5  
Oct 13, 2011   #1
** Please help me with any useful feedback, as well as how to shorten it to 500 words.**

It can be said that being in the same environment will never allow you to see the true realities of it, since all you face is a specific reality that may be far away from the truth. Living most of my life in Colombia up until I was seven years old, I never paid much attention to the poverty and hardships the country was facing. It was not until I came to the United States that I was able to contrast the different living conditions that the average person in America had compared to the living conditions of the common people of Colombia. Transportation, proper education, and accessible food were standard commodities in the United States, while in some parts of Colombia, most of these things were unheard of, and often considered a "luxury". This notable difference, of two countries considered part of "America" but yet so different, inspired me to try to make a change and provide support for those struggling in Colombia. I began my journey by associating myself with "Misión Child" (Mission Child), a nonprofit organization that reaches out to kids in poverty in South America. By starting fundraisers to collect money for the building of a new school in a poverty-stricken village in Bogotá, Colombia, I was able to start what I considered one of attempts to give back to my country. Although the program opened my eyes to several problems children of Colombia were facing, education was one factor, which stood out as the most important and lacking element affecting their development. Seeing these kids who aren't even given the opportunity to obtain an education, made me feel embarrassed and remorseful for sometimes taking education for granted. What mostly motivated me to participate and affiliate myself with Mission Child was the absolute vindication that in order to transform the future of a child, we must offer better living conditions that allow the full development of a child to an adult that is mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually healthy. If they don't have their basic needs met, how can they achieve their long-term personal and professional goals in the future?. This leads to a better tomorrow for all of society and humanity. I realized that in order to have a positive impact on the world, I must accept the challenge of investing in the education of children, who are ultimately the future leaders of the world. The program made great progress as a respectable learning institution was established in the village, providing not only a proper education but also essential needs and food for the children. After seeing the great results that "Mission Child" obtained, pushed me to initiate my own non-profit organization known as "Give Back". This organization's goal was to supply orphanages with essential supplies and necessities like toothpaste, toothbrushes, shampoo, deodorant, etc. By integrating my school as well as my community, I was able to expand the organization throughout the city of Miami, by speaking at my school's chapel, neighborhood churches, and even neighbors. Thanks to the support from my school and community, "Give Back" was able to collect several items to be delivered to "His House Children's Home"; a private, non-profit organization helping children and families through adoption and foster services. By participating in "Misión Child" and organizing "Give Back" I've developed a growing sense for community awareness and outreach. As I look back, I also see that none of these opportunities would have occurred if I had not moved to the United States. I know that college will feel like a completely different place than high school, but I welcome this difference with open arms knowing that change can bring out new opportunities and aspects in life. Having said this, I recognize that these opportunities have established wonderful principles that I could bring to the college campus, such as community awareness and outreach programs.

EF_Susan - / 2,365 12  
Oct 14, 2011   #2
It was not until I came to the United States, that I was able to contrast the different living condition...

This notable difference, of two countries considered part of "America" but yet so different, inspired me to try to make a change and provide support for those struggling in Colombia.

I was able to start what I considered one of my attempts to give back to my country.

Although the program opened my eyes to several problems the children of Colombia were facing, education was one factor,...

... we must offer better living conditions that would allow the full development of a child to an adult, that is mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually healthy.

By participating in "Misión Child" and organizing "Give Back" I've developed a growing sense of community awareness and outreach.

If you just write at the end, something about why this school is the best place for you to continue your studies and mission, your essay will be perfect.

:)


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