'Life is full of mistakes that need to be made in order to grow' My Common App Essay

When I was around 12 years old, a friend from my neighborhood invited me to go camping with him. I always considered myself to be an outdoorsman so I jumped at the opportunity to test myself in the wilderness. In the days leading up to the trip, I prepared myself by watching as many episodes of Man vs. Wild as I possibly could. I was ready for anything.

My friend Brooks was a year older than me and twice my size. His parents warned him of this fact and told him to take it a little slow for my sake. I interjected and assured them that I could handle anything Mother Nature threw at me; after all, I did watch three episodes of Man vs. Wild. On the first day we went to a river with hundreds of boulders strewn in it. We climbed on the rocks and moved upstream. He led and I followed as best as I could. Eventually, we came to what I thought was an impasse. Brooks easily cleared the space between the boulders. After some taunting and peer pressure it was finally my turn to jump.

I took a deep breath and readied myself. I positioned my arms like that of an airplane to be more aerodynamic and I began to run. I jumped while simultaneously yelling "EAGLE!" I knew yelling the name of a type of bird would have no effect on my leaping ability, but in the heat of the moment I did it anyway. I flew through the air with my gaze locked on my target. I remember excitedly thinking, "I'm going to make it!" I was wrong. I made it probably half way to the other boulder before gravity took effect and I plunged into two feet of water. My knees made contact with the rocky bottom and I suffered what I thought to be a life threatening injury. In reality, it was a couple of small cuts. It's important to mention that when in pain I have the tendency to overreact. "Oh no! There's blood everywhere! It's gushing! Call the ambulance boat; call the whole fleet! Call everybody!"

Eventually I stopped screaming and made the humiliating climb up the boulder on which Brooks was rolling with laughter. Although embarrassing, I do not regret my jump. I try not to regret anything I do in life. I have learned to live without fear or regret. Life is full of mistakes that need to be made in order to grow. Five years and many injuries later, I still hold this lesson to be true.

To me, this story sounds interesting, but you could improve by adding more details into it. For example, how did you 'get ready for it' other than watching Man vs. Wild?

"Although embarrassing, I do not regret my jump. I try not to regret anything I do in life. I have learned to live without fear or regret. Life is full of mistakes that need to be made in order to grow. Five years and many injuries later, I still hold this lesson to be true."

This part is a bit vague, as you should include how you learned from your experience, and how you made this lesson to be true. Details will greatly help.