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"Living in Japan has been an unpredictable" - Common App


kagayaku 1 / 5  
Dec 28, 2010   #1
This is still a rough draft and I would love to hear some input. I still don't have transition sentences between each paragraph so I'll be working a bit on those today.

All feedback is greatly appreciated! Only a couple more days...
Thanks again!
Given your personal background, describe an experience that illustrates what you would bring to the diversity in a college community.

It was a rainy Monday morning, only my second Monday in Japan. I hesitantly followed a family friend into a large and intimidating three story building covered in ivy. I walked slowly, each step getting heavier as I climbed the stairs. A man introduced himself as the principal, and while he talked to me with his limited English, I relied mostly on my interpreter friend. After a cup of bitter tea, I was taken to my new classroom. Students in the halls were calling my name and asking me questions in broken English. A large group started to form around us, and heads turned as we passed each classroom. After reaching my classroom, I gave a simple introduction and was greeted with cheering and applause. I quickly realized that going to a rural middle school in Japan wasn't going to be a normal experience. They had never met a foreigner their age and I had never met Japanese students mine.

I've been surrounded by a mixture of languages, foods, and cultures all my life. European grandparents, a best friend from Mexico, and Asian exchange students in my home exposed me to various tastes, languages, and cultural traditions from a young age. But living in two completely different countries was incomparable. Unfamiliar tastes and languages were exciting, but new cultures, viewpoints, and ways of thinking have changed me and the way I approach other people. Japan wasn't at all like what I had heard. School was so different from America that the same World History classes felt as if they were almost different subjects. Adapting to all of these differences has been both challenging and rewarding. Living in Japan has developed my understanding, acceptance, and open mindedness towards other people and cultures through discovering, adapting to, and embracing the many differences between America and Japan.

After learning enough Japanese to take part in my classes, I was surprised by the lack of similarities in the curriculum and the way that it was taught. Up to this point I had learned about wars and treaties, victories and defeats, triumphs and bitterness, from an American viewpoint. But after coming to Japan, I found that there is more than one way of looking at both past and present problems. There are accounts of historical events in the American and Japanese curriculum that I agree with, and others that are one-sided and lack critical details. Neither are complete and only by looking at a situation from many viewpoints can one come close to discovering more of the entire truth. This caused me to question some of my previous assumptions, and to be more open to those of others, thus resulting in a more balanced and open way of thinking.

From my experience, I have found that generalizing does not allow for any individual differences. After meeting many people of different countries, it seems that generalizations, while sometimes humorous, blocked me from getting to know people better. People who are from the same country have many slight differences in character and preferences which makes them unique. Not all Japanese are good at origami, and there are many who don't care for Japanese manga cartoons. And contrary to what many think, most Americans don't eat a cheeseburger with a cola every day. Today, stereotypes are making us more defensive towards certain races and affect our judgement of individuals. Taking time to understand people and their culture is important. Doing so helps us to see the richness and individuality of their cultures.

I have become more comfortable with moving and adapting to new places and circumstances. Blending with others has become something natural for me. I'm looking forward to find myself excited to visit new places, meet new people, and to learn new things. University education in America is a melting pot of people coming from a variety of backgrounds and locations. I feel that boundaries can't determine who we are and what we have the potential to become. Living in a foreign country encouraged me to push my boundaries past my comfort zone. Doing things like trying new foods and speaking with various people in Japanese while I was still learning. Once at university, I look forward to getting to know many different people. I would like to help organize outdoor activities like camping or skiing, as well as participating in many other extracurricular activities.

Living in Japan has been an unpredictable yet exciting experience. But it hasn't all been easy. It was difficult leaving America and passing up on events like prom, going to football games, and even small things like American cereals and cartoons. But as a whole, I feel that this experience has positively benefited me. The language, the new friends, the different perspectives, and the thirst and curiosity to understand other people and their cultures. This experience has also left me better prepared to join an increasingly diversified and ever-changing working society. I want to enrich others with my unique experiences and help them to see the world from a broader point of view. I'm confident that the competitive yet supportive atmosphere of university will be ideal for both sharing with others what I have learned and learning new concepts from others.
Jpuck 4 / 28  
Dec 28, 2010   #2
I quickly realized that going to a rural middle school in Japan wasn't going to be a normal
- going to middle school in a rural part of Japan

They had never met a foreigner their age and I had never met Japanese students mine.
- the end of this sentence is a little awkward.

After learning enough Japanese to take part in my classes
-"to take part" = participate

But after coming to Japan
- "coming" = "going"

This essay is very strong, and very detailed. It sounds like your experience in Japan was enlightening.
diboy2 6 / 23  
Dec 28, 2010   #3
I just saw another japan essay a while ago, but this one sounds and is worded better.
I had never met Japan students mine.

But after coming to Japan, I found that there is more than one way of looking at both past and present problems.

What was different in Japan"s history to America?
OP kagayaku 1 / 5  
Dec 28, 2010   #4
Thanks so much for the input! What about the second half of the essay?


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