Any help is appreciated!!!
Please be harsh :)
Do I sound too whimsical and romantic but not practical and reasonable? What part do you think should be dropped?
And since I am not a native speaker, please help me with my grammar bugs. THANKS A LOOOOOOT!
NYU's global network provides students with hundreds of academic areas of interest for students to cultivate their intellectual curiosity and to help achieve their career goals. Whether you are entirely undecided about your academic plans or you have a definitive program of study in mind, what are your own academic interests? Feel free to share any thoughts on any particular programs or how you might explore those interests at NYU on any of our campuses.ïź1500charïź
"Search results: 0."
I stared at the monitor for a while, kind of astonished, when I saw these words came up with a search engine for the first time. I was fairly young then, still new with computer. However, I had already been intrigued by this magical omnipotent machine, which could answer all my questions and provide me with all software I had wanted. As a little girl, I worshiped it, so my astonishment was understandable.
Then came the excitement. The software I was looking for HAD NOT BEEN DEVELOPED yet. Why not develop it myself? Hundreds of crude ideas bumped in my minds and the possibility to innovate ignited me. However, the excitement was soon replaced by disappointment, because I did not know how to code at all at that time. Then the disappointment eventually turned into growing thirst. A thirst for learning computer science, with which I can incarnate even my most fantastic ideas, enjoy the fun of solving puzzles and create something new.
I have always longed to build my own software, for not only me myself but also others who have needed it. To develop promising software, which meets people's need perfectly, a broad horizon is essential for me. This is one of the reasons for my love for NYUAD, where cultures merge and innovative ideas boom, where students have means like J-terms to get to know the world in a global perspective. Another reason is NYUAD fulfill my desire to study independently by offering students Capstone Project. I believe that, with the help of the pre-professional tracks and resources like academic resource center provided by NYU, one day, I will be able to change the Search results with my software and change the world with my ideas.
Well, I think your essay is very interesting, and has answer the prompt very well.
In fact, I am also applying for NYUAD, and this is the very first time I saw essay with NYUAD in it.
I didn't really see any mistakes in your essay. By the way, I am not a native speaker, either, so I can only tell you my opinion.
Hope I can see you on candidate weekend. Good luck!!
Thanks for your feedback =)
NYUAD is my dream school. Love it with my whole soul!
Hope to see you on CW, too!~Thanks again :)
I think it's really good but you might want to talk about the program at NYUAD the suits you as well! Can you please see mine as well?
thank youu and good luck I hope you get an acceptance
I am going read yours and I hope I can be helpful.
It's a good essay but I have a few suggestions. Firstly, I got what you were talking about in the beginning and I know you were trying to be creative but you need to clarify it a bit because I can see how that can confuse a reader. The second thing I would like to tell you is try to talk about something in NYUAD that is only specific to NYUAD (I dont know if J terms are NYU exclusive so if they are forgive me). If you take my considerations into mind I think you'll have a good essay that will enhance your chances of admission.
Hope I helped! Can you please take a look at my Uchicago essay?
Great essay... I really like it, you have shown your passion towards coding!! Is it ok to go over the word limit... you have to make sure it does not get cut off when you do the preview! Good luck :)
Thanks for your suggestions!
Um.. About the beginning, I am not sure how to clarify it. Is it the way I describe it or the words I use confusing? Need your advice..
I only apply for NYUAD so I am not very familiar with NYU actually...However, it is true that J-term is one of the distinguishing features of NYUAD =)
I will try to help you with your essays :)