Please help me to revise it. Thank you so very.
I've experienced a thing that shocked me and had a great effect on my opinion about the life when I was a middle school student. It's a visiting to the orphanage in my city. Since I was born in a happiness family, I had no ideas about what a orphanage and another life could be. Actually,I remember that the equipments and hardwares there are ok but it seems that these kids hadn't been took care well as the orphanage was short of the staff. Even sometimes those kids were just waved away and I had to say their cry was real pathetic. Seeing that made me thankful to my parents and all the persons who gave me the happy life. However, when I tried to figure out the methods to solve the problem, I thought a lot.
Personally, the key which leaded to the current situation was the responsibility. By that, I mean if the parents of the orphanages can take their responsibility or the social can treat them seriously as its responsibility those problems can be avoided at all.Aditonally, responsibility seems to be all the keys of social issues. Because the best way to solve problems is to take responsibility to curb the development of the problems compared with solving the problems after they are occurred. Furthermore, to extend it to myself, what is my responsibility? Now, I have the most supportive parents, the best schools, and the most dedicated teachers in the world. However, none of it will make a difference, none of it will matter. All I should do are to fulfill my responsibilities, show up to my school, pay attention to those teachers, listen to your parents, and put in the hard work it takes to succeed. Compared to these children, I am lucky. I should take responsibility for my life and my education, and set goals for myself. As my major is management, in this extent, I think the most significant responsibility of a manager is to help human to use the resource effectively in a largest limit. At the end, this visiting really has a positive effect on my life and study.
What a great edit by dinh thi thu... thanks!!
Lumei Lin, I think you should practice typing each sentence 10 times the right way, and speak the words aloud.
Personally, the key which leaded to the current situation was the responsibility.
In the sentence above, you expressed a great idea. I think "responsibility" is exactly the right word for the situation. However, if you say "Personally," you have to say, "I believe..."
Personally, I believe the key to understanding the current situation is...
:-)
