Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.
Everyone wishes his or her dream can be achieved someday. These dreams must be shaped by the world we are living in. I have my own dream, too. Since I was a little girl, I have been wishing to become an entertainer when I grow up. It is an extraordinary dream with great difficulties. However, my preponderance makes it easier for me to reach my dream, and the biggest advantage that I hold is my family's background.
Both of my parents work in the field of media group. Their jobs include interacting with advertising agencies, TV productions, and record companies, which are all parts of the entertainment industry. Since I was two years old, my parents had been occasionally taking me with them to work. Therefore, I always played with media workers rather than children my own age. Although this doesn't sound appropriate for a child, I actually enjoyed it. As I gained more information and knowledge of the entertainment industry from the media workers, my desire of wanting to become a celebrity grew stronger.
After meeting various artists, I realized how eventful and fulfilling their lives are; and how it is the kind of life I would like to live. Among all the interactions with media workers, the most influential thing was making friend with an entertainer. When I was a junior student, I went to the year-end feast of my father's company and met an entertainer who is a singer as well as an actor. After we got to know each other, we often had conversations either on the Internet or at social meetings. Through communicating with a valid entertainer, I acquired more practical ideas about the advantages and disadvantages of being a celebrity. She told me it is stressful and she is utterly fatigued to achieve her high standards on every work; it is uncomfortable to be tracked by the paparazzi; it is terrific to have a sense of achievement when reaching every goal; it is also gratifying when gaining new knowledge and extraordinary experience. After comparing these consequences of being an entertainer and my personality cautiously, I think I can overcome the obstacles and also reap the benefits brought by working in the entertainment industry.
Being an entertainer cannot only rely on the influence of interpersonal relationships in the entertainment industry. A superior entertainer will also need to work on their own to develop and cultivate their talents and characteristics. The significant benefits from holding my family background are enhancing my information about the working style and reality of entertainment industry; and thereby increasing the performance opportunities for me. And so far, I have been discovered by a record company's music producer and already have many diverse experiences in the entertainment industry. However, I am still a student; the most important thing I should be worked on is my education. Achieving my dream will not be limited by time. Based on my instructional family background, rich experiences, and the scholarly knowledge which will be acquired in my future academic life, I believe I can integrate my internal abilities and external prerequisites to maximize the possibility of achieving my dream
I have been wishing to become an entertainer when I grow up
Sounds choppy...I have always wanted sounds much better
Therefore, I always played with media workers rather than children my own age
Consequently instead of therefore would do
my desire of wanting to become a celebrity grew stronger.
my desire of wanting equally sounds chopppy....rewrite!!
the biggest advantage that I hold is my family's background.
Maybe you can be more specific here. You can say that your advantage is the empowerment that comes from experiences with your parents' work. Or, you could make it more specific in your own way... but this last sentence of the 1st paragraph is an important part of the essay. What do you think?
Therefore, I always played with media workers rather than children my own age.---> In this sentence, I think "as a result" works better than "therefore." I don't know how to explain why, though!!
Being an entertainer cannot only rely on the influence of interpersonal relationships in the entertainment industry. -----> For this sentence, I recommend slight revision at the start:
An
aspiring entertainer cannot only rely on the influence of interpersonal relationships in the entertainment industry.
