"a member of the local soccer team" - short answer on extracurricular activities

--I need help shortening my text to 150 words or under. Right now it is at about 270 words.

Question: Please briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities or work experiences in the space below (150 words or fewer)

I feel that being a member of the local soccer team since I started grade school has benefited me greatly. Soccer, or football as it is called here, has taught me many valuable skills, ones that I can use in everyday life situations.

As part of a soccer team, I have learned that you need to go through a lot of work and effort with your teammates in order to successfully achieve good results. You can discover how to support your colleagues as well as receive support and encouragement from them.

During my ten-year career as a soccer player I have experienced both accomplishment and hardship, and have enjoyed it all. Not much is comparable to the feelings that follow after out-playing an opponent and winning a match, but nothing tastes better than coming back from a loss and reclaiming glory with your team!

I will always remember that after performing badly in the season three years ago, we rose up from the ashes and won the following year. From this I have learned that even though times can be tough, if you work hard and never give up, you can reach your goals.

if got a question do you know whats the difference between telling and showing?


I would leave this out. You don't have to say this explicitly. I think the reader knows that communication skills and so on are invaluable skills and that they are usefull in everyday life situations.

I also think that you don't need four paragraphs. Try to fit everything within one paragraph (saves some space)

Thank you. I will try do that, but not sure what else to cut out.
Do you think my text answers the question in a good way? I have the feeling that it does not.

You tell for most of the time which isn't too effective. And the times that you do give moments of your career, they are a tad boring. I recommend that you first give an overall background of your soccer career and how it has been. The problem here is that you want to cram in all of these lessons but there simply isn't the space. Choose the two or three that matter the most and use them in your essay.

This uses a lot of words to say something that is very simple and common.

Here is the awesome sentence:
Not much is comparable to the feelings that follow after out-playing an opponent and winning a match, but nothing tastes better than coming back from a loss and reclaiming glory with your team!

Scrap everything that comes before this great sentence. Let this be the first sentence of the essay. :-)