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U of Michigan, gained respect for intellectual, social, or cultural differences.


anwy71 1 / 2  
Nov 4, 2009   #1
"We know that diversity makes us a better university - better for learning, for teaching, and for conducting research." (U-M President Mary Sue Coleman)

Share an experience through which you have gained respect for intellectual, social, or cultural differences. Comment on how your personal experiences and achievements would contribute to the diversity of the University of Michigan. (approximately 250words)

<The true friend>

After I finished up the last page of the book Tuesdays with Morrie, I questioned if a teacher and a student be true friends. It did not take long to answer 'no', especially in Korean society where strict formalities exist; students would bow to teachers rather than saying 'hello' and use the terms of respect.

I found my previous answer to be wrong while attending Buenos Aires English High School in Argentina as a 7th grade student. Since I could hardly understand Spanish, the teacher in the library called Sophia, who was more than seventy years old, translated math test sheets into English for me.

In the small room next to the library, she would sit on the wooden chair with the test sheets on the desk and two new papers for translation. I would sit on the crotch of a desk next to the window.

'How many words did you memorize today?' I take out a small paper full of basic Spanish words to show her. 'Twenty. But they are not easy.' She smiles. When I'm about to head to my classroom with the papers she has done for me, she slips something into my hand. 'This is a lucky chocolate. Good luck on the test!' She winks and I say 'Thank you...so much.'

My old friend of different culture let me know what it was like to become a friend regardless of ages. Either during my life at University of Michigan and rest of life, the lesson will help me associate with people of diverse culture and age and exchange true feelings with them
umrily181 3 / 7  
Nov 4, 2009   #2
its a nice essay it just needs to be strengthened
im pretty sure when you give a title of a book it has to be underlined italicized or in quotes its one of those just im not sure which one but you can find it online..

I questioned if a teacher and a student COULD be true friends.
OP anwy71 1 / 2  
Nov 5, 2009   #3
Thank you 'umrily181' for your comment!
umrily181 3 / 7  
Nov 5, 2009   #4
no problem :]
if u get a chance could u look over my essay and tel me what you think
thankyou
Liebe 1 / 542 2  
Nov 5, 2009   #5
You have made a number of very obvious grammatical errors that need to be revised if you want to strengthen your essay.
Moonshadow0302 - / 68  
Nov 5, 2009   #6
You need to work on your English more. The idea is good but you need to go over your essay thoroughly in order to correct the language. Using the wrong word at the wrong place will mess up things a bit.

For instance, I'm not sure you really meant to say -

the crotch of a desk
OP anwy71 1 / 2  
Nov 5, 2009   #7
Thank you everyone for your comments!!
I'm a grew up in Korea...so English grammar is very hard for me.
My Enlish teacher will assist with the problems.
Anyway, thank you so much!
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Nov 6, 2009   #8
I only see one actual correction that was made here! And it was Christina:
the book Tuesdays with Morrie, I questioned if a teacher and a student could be true friends.

I see a few others we can fix!! It must be so hard to learn a new language...

Since I could hardly understand Spanish, the teacher in the library named Sophia (who was more than seventy years old) translated math test sheets into English for me.

Can you say something at the end about Tuesdays with Morrie, and compare Maurie with your teacher?

Also, put these 2 paragraphs together as one:
I found my previous answer to be wrong while attending Buenos Aires English High School in Argentina as a 7th grade student. Since I could hardly understand Spanish, the teacher in the library called Sophia, who was more than seventy years old, translated math test sheets into English for me. In the small room next to the library, she would sit on the wooden chair with the test sheets on the desk and two new papers for translation. I would sit on the crotch of a desk next to the window.

Kind regards!!
tal105 7 / 130  
Nov 6, 2009   #9
in my opinion, i think its necessary that you mention your korean. you sorta just leave the reader to assume that from this essay. i think its importatn for you to say "being korean growing up in traditional korean society..." or w.e. you wrote i think will help the flow.

o answer 'no', especially in Korean society where strict formalities exist; students would bow to teachers rather than saying 'hello' and use the terms of respect.

see! you just say in korean society. u assume the reader knows your korean! lol.

besides that and grammar stuff, this is very nice.

My old friend of a different culture

good luck!


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