Unanswered [0] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Undergraduate   % width Posts: 9


MIT essay, Boston; 'I do volunteering job in Boston with Arabs for Altruism'


almawadxp 1 / 3  
Mar 29, 2014   #1
Hi
I am an international student in Boston. I am studying English there and I'll apply for MIT next fall. I wrote my essay and I need to help me please.

We know you lead a busy life, full of activities, many of which are required of you. Tell us about something you do simply for the pleasure of it. (100 words or fewer)

Every weekend I do volunteering job in Boston with Arabs for Altruism. Our job is helping others, homeless or serving food with the famous organizations like Boston homeless shelter and Boston Food Bank. Also, I work with Academia which is an organization to help Saudi students to get accepted to study in the USA and it is free .However, I also help any student who is looking for acceptance regardless of his/her citizenship. I always help new students who come to Boston by picking them up from the airport, reserving hotels and introducing Boston for them for free.

Although you may not yet know what you want to major in, which department or program at MIT appeals to you and why? (100 words or fewer)

Since I was in grade 11 in high school, I have aspired to be researcher after I had read "Memoirs of a physicist" which was written by the scientist Richard J. Weiss. I was very impressed by Richard and he made me loved researching and I believed that Math is the heart of researching. The most interesting in math is discovering and solving problems and these advantages evoked me to love math major. Also, I have aspiration to open Math Institute for talent students in Saudi Arabia because I believe we need to improve math in Saudi Arabia.

What attribute of your personality are you most proud of, and how has it impacted your life so far? This could be your creativity, effective leadership, sense of humor, integrity, or anything else you'd like to tell us about. (200-250 words)

A student asked me about " Total Mechanical Energy" when I was student at YUC before a day of physics exam and I explained to him but the time wasn't enough to explain more deeply. The problem was mathematical more than physics and I had seen this problem with most students in physics class. Since we know that the ability to use algebra specially "using equation" is helpful to set the solution in physics. I was thinking about making special course for Basic Algebra. Because I work in School, I asked my manager to open class for volunteering in weekends and he appreciated that ,so he accepted it. I put announcement to whom wanting basic skills for math and physics. 25 students attended the courses after a month, 19 are passed their physics exam and also their ability improved in math too. After that, I received many emails to open the class again and I talked to a friend of mine to volunteer. We opened two classes and we added extra math skills with extra a month and all students who had filed in physics and math, after they attended the course they passed their exams with average "B" and some of them got "A" in physics and math. After we did survey about why they didn't understand these skills in the class, 80% are shame to ask the professor in the class. This project still working until now for learning students who has difficulty to understand in the class.and it became part of Department of Education in Yanbu.

.
niesaysi 16 / 290 85  
Mar 30, 2014   #2
Since we know that the ability to use algebra specially "using equation" is helpful to set the solution in physics. I was thinking about making special course for Basic Algebra.

Combine these two sentences. You cannot separate them. Otherwise, it will be grammatically incorrect.

We opened two classes and added extra math skills with extra a month and all students who had filed in physics and math, after they attended the course they passed their exams with average "B" and some of them got "A" in physics and math.

This has several grammatical issues. So it should be better fixed this way.
We opened two classes with one-month extension and added extra math skills for all the attendees. All of them had filed in physics and math, and after they took the course, they passed their exams with a mark of "A " and "B" in both subjects.
dumi 1 / 6,925 1592  
Apr 1, 2014   #3
Every weekend I do a volunteering job in Boston with Arabs for Altruism. Our job is helping others,the homeless or serving food with the famous organizations like Boston homeless shelter and Boston Food Bank. Also, I work with Academia which is ana voluntary organization to help Saudi students to get accepted to study in the USA and it is free .
OP almawadxp 1 / 3  
Apr 1, 2014   #4
thank you guys for helping me
is the rest of the essay appropiated to put it into MIT's application?
thank you again
Ulaai 3 / 42 27  
Apr 1, 2014   #5
80% are shametoo shy

Because I work in Sat s chool

In the first essay, don't forget to express your pleasure that you gained from doing such activities. Instead of stating three at a time, you can choose only one then explain why you love to do it so much!

I have no problem with the rest of your essays. Seems good to me. Good luck with your application!
OP almawadxp 1 / 3  
Apr 1, 2014   #6
I'll do it and state one activity, please any one has suggstion tells me I realy need your help
saitheja - / 3 2  
Apr 2, 2014   #7
Never use slang while writing essays. It must be Mathematics and not Math.

Since my high school, I always aspired to become a researcher after I had read Richard J. Weiss's "Memoirs of a physicist". The analytical ability while solving problems has evoked interest in me to pursue a major in Mathematics. Also, I have a dream to start a Mathematics Institute for talented students in Saudi Arabia.
eddies [Contributor] 25 / 1,208 476  
Apr 5, 2014   #8
A student asked me about " Total Mechanical Energy" when I was student at YUC before a day of physics exam and I explained to him ( a comma) but the time wasn't enough to explain more deeply.

Put a comma before the word but . Or you break this sentence into two to make your readers easy to follow the logical order from this sentence.

Because I worked/have worked in School, I asked my manager

Pay attention to tense use.
This project is still working/works in progressuntil now for learning students who hashave difficulty to understand in the class. (a comma here) and it has became/ becomes part of Department of Education in Yanbu.
OP almawadxp 1 / 3  
May 3, 2014   #9
excuse me I think there is something wrong you said " it has became/ becomes part of Department of Education in Yanbu. "
because it is in present perfect so it should be " It has become not becomes" and still is gerund so after still always "ing"

please correct me if I am confused
thanks


Home / Undergraduate / MIT essay, Boston; 'I do volunteering job in Boston with Arabs for Altruism'
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳