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MIT Pleasure Short Essay (PokemonGo): I don't know if I should even keep this specific topic


dzlhrt 1 / -  
Sep 5, 2019   #1

the sense of satisfaction



Prompt:
We know you lead a busy life, full of activities, many of which are required of you. Tell us about something you do simply for the pleasure of it. (100 words or fewer)

I started playing PokemonGo again early last year after a two year break. When I opened the app again, there were multiple which increased Pokemon spawns and added raids, making the game interesting again. I had my app linked to my Health app, so I could get steps without having the app open. And when I open the app in an area I know has PokeStops, catching even the most common of Pokemon and getting the *Gotcha!* message gives a weird sense of satisfaction. And the most powerful the Pokemon, the greater that sense of sense of satisfaction.

Maria [Contributor] - / 727 281  
Sep 11, 2019   #2
@dzlhrt
Hi there. Welcome to the forum! I apologize for the delay. However, I hope that this feedback becomes beneficial for your writing endeavors.

Firstly, as a general perception of the text you have at the moment, I think that it would be better if you had utilized a more formal language when writing. Remember that it is critical that you have this enhanced written outlook as this will make your writing more intensive and alluring to the readers. Having said that, I do also suggest that you evade the repetitive usage of language as it drags your language down in the long-run. Try to be meaningful and intentional in your writing.

Furthermore, I also recommend that you try to initiate a more appropriate writing correspondence. I do not particularly have an idea as to for which purpose this writing is entirely for, but you should try to use a more enhanced version of the writing. Opt to talk enthusiastically about your love for a passion instead of a passing-by activity. This would definitely have more of an impact than anything else.


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