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Model UN - Common App Short Essay. Too common?


barriertx 1 / -  
Dec 7, 2011   #1
For the Short Essay on Activities, is Model UN adesirable topic? Also, any comments on my draft are greatly appreciated. Thanks.

Model United Nations: I have developed a passion for international issues, different cultures, and global affairs. I am especially drawn to emerging economies in Southeast Asia, and Central and South America. Travel, reading, foreign language study (Chinese and Spanish), and hosting Korean exchange students for three years have stimulated this interest. But, as a Founding Member of Model UN at Lamar High School, helping to start, build and lead our new chapter has provided the greatest challenges, rewards, and fun. During my leadership tenure, I created and chaired two Model UN conferences hosted by Austin High and was awarded Overall Best Delegate at a large regional conference in San Antonio. These conferences provide opportunities to debate, negotiate, and learn in friendly, but spirited competitions. I am excited to continue to develop my interests in multicultural and global issues during college, in my career, and throughout my life.

Guest /  
Dec 7, 2011   #2
i don't think the topic's too common, it's not like everybody is in the Model UN. i think you should make it more personal though. your essay seems as if you're just listing what you've accomplished with the Model UN and not what it really means to you.

"But, as a Founding Member of Model UN at Lamar High School, helping to start, build and lead our new chapter has provided the greatest challenges, rewards, and fun."

what were the challenges, rewards and fun? show the readers, don't just tell.
what really interests you about Model UN? be more specific, relate it to who you are.
i'm sure you can come up with something better if you make it more personal, good luck!
i'm having problems with my common app short essay too, comments are really welcomed! :)


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