This is my first time to submit any work online sooo, here goes. Disclaimer: This is a very rough first draft. The ''''''' are places where I'm not sure of the info.
Topic A (Freshman)
My mom is definitely the person who has impacted my life the most. Being homeschooled, I'm around her nearly 24/7. Some people would count this as a curse, and, truth be told, at times I've had the same thoughts. However, I wouldn't trade my mom for the world.
My mom grew up in Abilene, Texas, horny-toad capital of the world, collecting the critters and proudly showing her newest pets to the townsfolk. Her family eventually moved to Silsbee, just outside Beaumont's city limits. She attended Lamar University after receiving a full ride from the Greenberg Foundation based on academic merit. She became a regent for the her dorm and the treasurer for the """"" Organization. She received her Bachelor's degree in Social Work and married my father in 1993. I popped up the year after, and my mom was faced with a choice. She could take the world by the horns and pursue her career or she could sacrifice her dreams and do everything she could to turn this little crying bundle to into a godly, studious young man. I am forever in debt to my mom for choosing the latter. From Sesame Street to College Avenue, she has literally been with me every step of the way.
This past year has seen the addition of two little girls to our family. My mom made the choice to adopt the twin 5-month old daughters of an extended family member. This means that my parents' sacrificed their hard-earned peace and ease of life to save my new sisters. I hope I can rightly choose when a decision this import presents itself. Our lives have changed a lot since the adoption, although none quite as much as my mom's. We often laugh at the fact that we're narrowing down colleges with Sesame Street in the background. And though at times it's hard, she never misses a beat, keeping the house clean, babies happy, me and my sisters on track with school.
I regret to say that, like most teens, I take my mom for granted. It was only when I racked my mind for a subject for this essay that I realized just how much she has sacrificed to get me where I am. I can't really express the gratitude I have for the gift she's given me, except to say that I will not let these opportunities go to waste.
I wouldn't say "when I racked my mind for a subject for the essay" in the actually essay. I would definitely reword that say tie that into how you take her for granted sometimes, the way you have, just reword that one part. Don't say anything about the essay in the essay.
I also wouldn't add your mom's whole life story in the first part, the reader isn't worried about what your mom has done but they want to know about her impact on YOU. You explain how great she is in the essay, but what has this taught you?
