NaddieWU 1 / 2 Mar 10, 2011 #1PromtPlease briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities or work experiences in the space below (150 words or fewer, 1000 character maximum).ResponseModel UN is one of the most significant elements through my high school life. At first, I was just a member of school MUN Club. From there, I learned about MUN for the first time and attended several club meetings. Later I participated in some large-scaled conferences and started to be familiar and infatuated with Model UN. In Grade 11 I became the leader of school MUN Club. As a leader, I have to in charge of the whole club, including recruitment of new members; leading new members into the world of MUN; contacting conferences and for them. I had many "first times" from MUN. The first time to give a speech in front of a large amount of people; the first time to design a recruitment poster; the first time to do all the logistical works and took care of them while we went out taking conferences. I received unforgettable experiences from MUN.154 words in total.I think my answer is quite flat....If there is any gramma mistakes, please also tell me~Thank you
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129 Mar 14, 2011 #2I see the distance between my level and a native one.Native speakers are not at a different level. They just have a different dialect. Your way is just as good.Jerry, you are great...This edit is very good! I'm really impressed with some of the suggestions. Please check out the EssayForum Contributor Page.Here is another bit of advice. That first sentence is boring! You need a first sentence that will make the reader VERY interested. You can catch the reader's interest if you make a unique observation, making an observation about the experience based on your own unique personality.:-)
