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"there is more to music than just the written word" - UF undergrad essay-> 1979

Nightmre1225 1 / 2  
Sep 8, 2009   #1
Topic : please write a concise narrative in which you describe a meaningful event, experience or accomplishment in your life and how it will affect your college experience or your contribution to the UF campus community. You may want to reflect on your ideas about student responsibility, academic integrity, campus citizenship or a call to service.

My essay: Imagine a song that captures the essence of life and youth. Like life itself, it starts from nothing, one second in and still only silence. Slowly from a distance, the sound of drums fill the person's ears, signifying the beginning of its life. Slowly, louder and louder the drums become, pulsating the eardrums until finally at six seconds an explosion of noise, a simple drumbeat and guitars. Something has been born. Five chords in and she has been given a personality, she is serene, she is youth. Fourteen seconds later she has a voice, she speaks the mind of the young and preaches their words, the restlessness, the immediacy of actions, and their carefree lifestyle. She's at the top of the world, growing and growing with each layer of sound added to her to make her unique. It's two minutes and twenty seconds later, her tone has changed to something new, growing up in the process we've all gone through, the chapter of her life, her youth is coming to a close. In her final minutes we hear her final reflections of these moments of her life; we hear it at her best, where nothing really mattered and growing up was just a myth. The final moment, the final verse, music and lyric give way to the drums that signaled her life in this world and now guide her as she fades away into a final moment of sonic silence...a mere memory.

The first time I heard this song it was in the middle of second semester term of my freshmen year in high school. Our teacher was out on an errand at this particular moment, leaving us by ourselves the rest of the period. Instead of talking to friends, I wanted to hear music (Instead of filling my ears with conversation, I wanted to fill them with music). I used a friend's phone as opposed to my own personal player to find something new and exciting. I recognized only one artist, Smashing Pumpkins, though I had never given them a listen I decided to this once. Moving the large speakers towards my ear, I clicked the song I wanted to hear, 1979 was her name, and since then my life hasn't been the same. The volume was low, the quality was bad, and talks of the coming weekend overpowered the sonic waves emitting from the speakers, but still I heard it. First a moment silence, then the sound of distant drums followed by a melody that seemed the most familiar I've ever heard despite never hearing it before. That day, I made a connection with that song, one that would last past present day. It would be the first song I would fall in love with.

Over the next three years this song would evolve out of her state of being "just a song", it would comfort me if I ever felt sad or frustrated. If I was ever nervous, just thinking about the melody(?), would ease my nerves and bring me confidence. It was as if she had become a person that was always there with me through the best and worst of times. As a person it has taught me a lesson I will never forget. Though her words evoke a sense of nostalgia on our carefree younger selves, the song itself shows us that this state of life is not everlasting, that there is an end, a death and we must eventually face it. When I realized this, a part of me seemed to wither away, I was always told I wasn't invincible, but it never really connected in my head. This song, materializing in front of me changed that forever. But I don't miss the sense of invincibility. I can now see the world through my eyes as it is truly meant to be and how to live in it to the best of my ability.

What I can contribute to the University of Florida is my sense of motivation and desire to fulfill the final younger years of my life with something that I can reflect on in my older years and be proud of, through what I know best... Music. I want to show that there is more to music than just the written word and some well crafted sound but rather, that when those things come together they create this sonic bliss that takes on another form and can change a life, like it did mine.

Rough copy, any criticism or w/e is welcome, and enjoy i guess

Mayada 6 / 96  
Sep 8, 2009   #2
Oh my God. You have proved that ANYTHING could be a significant experience. It depends on how you express it. You have BEAUTIFULLY described how a simple song affected you. Although I'm not that interested in music and instruments, I have been touched by your essay. I felt it..

What I feel that this essay lack is "why this song".. You like music. How come no other song influenced you like this one? What does that year represent in the song "1979"? What about the lyrics itself, how did it affect you, and what were they about?

When I read your essay, I felt that you are deep person, but I still wanted to find out more about the song itself. You did explain how it affected you, but all I know about it is its title and singers..

Other than that.. I love it!
OP Nightmre1225 1 / 2  
Sep 8, 2009   #3
Haha thanks a lot Mayada really brightened me up what you said. You do raise a good point, I may need to expand a bit on the whys as opposed to the hows maybe. Thanks again for the help =D
EF_Simone 2 / 1,986  
Sep 8, 2009   #4
You do a beautiful job of portraying the experience but fall far short when it comes to explaining how this experience "will affect your college experience or your contribution to the UF campus community."
OP Nightmre1225 1 / 2  
Sep 8, 2009   #5
Yeah that's where I kind of died in writing, kind of wrote this in one sitting so i figured it may have fell flat a bit

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