Unanswered [3] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Undergraduate   % width Posts: 4

What you would name a story of your life until now - Emerson Supplemental Essay


alexandria2091 1 / -  
Mar 11, 2011   #1
Hi everyone, here is my unrevised supplemental essay for the undergrad journalism program at Emerson College. Any help would be much appreciated. Thanks!

Much of the work that students do at Emerson College is a form of storytelling. If you were to write the story of your life until now, what would you title it? Why? Please be brief (400-600 words).

When I'm happy, I write. When I'm sad, I write. When I think of a creative idea, I write. I write to let my emotions and ideas out of my being and onto paper. Writing is my medicine.

After reading the instructions for this essay prompt I became instantly intrigued, various ideas flowing through my mind. I have always had a strong passion for writing. From a very young age I spent a lot of my free time writing, whether it was poetry, creative short stories or any other methods. Growing up I was a very shy individual, often keeping my thoughts to myself. Despite the fact that I was a quiet child, I had a very creative mind. I found it much easier expressing myself in words, through writing. When holidays came around I would always write poems or funny stories for my family members to read. I was always very interested in all aspects of writing. Although I am not currently writing a non-fiction novel based on my life, I am however in the process of composing two separate books, one being a fiction based story about a troubled young girl, detailing all of the encounters she goes through in her adolescent life and how she learns and progresses from those experiences. The second novel is a non-fiction piece regarding the social networking website Facebook and the negative aspects that come along with being a member of this online community. That being said, I find this writing prompt very interesting and enjoyable.

If I were to write a story of my life until now, I would title it "Nineteen Years: To be Continued." I put a lot of thought into this writing prompt due to the fact that it is so open ended and being the creative person that I am, I could have gone many ways with this. Many television shows end with a brief display of the words "To be continued," causing the viewer to ponder what will happen next. These words relate to my life because I am constantly wondering what events lie in my future. I have so many hopes and dreams when it comes to what I yearn to do with my life, but the real question is, what will these aspirations lead to? One can never foresee the future considering there can be so many unpredictable loops and turns along the way. I am very confident that one day I will be a successful journalist, traveling the world and doing what I love, but I cannot help thinking about how different my life will be twenty years from now. My life in the past year has been at this sort of standstill, thinking deeply about where I want to continue my studies, and I find it very interesting to envision what direction my passions will lead me in. This is why, if I were to write a story about my life until now, I would title it "Nineteen Years: To be Continued."
ItsokaytoGaga 15 / 96  
Mar 12, 2011   #2
Hey Alexandria!

Your introduction is good. But then you talk about what books your writing, which is fine. However, after that you start the next sentence talking about your personality. I felt that there was a break of flow over there. I think it would be helpful if you revise your first para. Maybe talk about yourself and then say what you are doing currently. Just to improve on the flow of sentences and ideas :)

That being said, I love your second half. Things take a turn there. You have some real nice flow of thoughts in this para.

I like your essay. Just a little revision and I think it will be fine.

Good Luck!!! :)
ItsokaytoGaga 15 / 96  
Mar 14, 2011   #3
Hey there! :)

Okay there is much better flow to your essay than your previous draft. The transition of ideas looks good.

Growing up I was a very shy individual, often keeping my thoughts to myself. Despite the fact that I was a quiet child, I had a very creative mind. I found it much easier expressing myself in words, through writing.

I like this part very much. I can relate to it in many ways. :) It gives the reader an insight into your personality..
Though I want to tell you that if you could rephrase the last sentence of the above quote and twist it to something a little more interesting, it would make a much better impact. Since the last line is the most important. :-) Just a suggestion..

Although I am not currently writing a non-fiction novel based on my life....

Umm, I think I don't understand this part. Are you supposed to write a non-fiction novel on your life? What was your intention to put it this way? I don't think I got it... :/

That being said, I find this writing prompt very interesting and enjoyable.

I don't think this line is necessary. You've already mentioned that this quote intrigued and inspired you.

I put a lot of thought into this writing prompt due to the fact that it is so open ended and being the creative person that I am, I could have gone many ways with this.

I somehow feel that you are saying that your creative, but not showing it. You've mentioned your creativity in the first paragraph already. No need to say that you've put a lot of thought into writing this piece. Just show it, don't tell. Infuse it in your essay. I think it will catch the reader's attention immediately. :-)

That's what I feel... ultimately it's your call on how you want your essay to be...

All that being said, your essay shines in the last part. It's well written towards the end.

Anyway, hope I could help you well enough! :)
All the Best for this! Good Luck!
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Mar 14, 2011   #4
After reading the instructions for this essay prompt I became instantly intrigued, various ideas flowing through my mind.

Beautiful, A.
Check out Strunk and White, because your writing has potential for great stuff. Learn the little subtleties of style.

Growing up I was a very shy individual, often keeping my thoughts to myself. ---You can express this in fewer words as part of a different sentence.

Despite the fact that I was a quiet child, I had a very creative mind.---this kind of assertion is not so meaningful. "Show, don't tell." If you show an example of this, you do not even need to resort to making the claim.

Anyway, this is brilliant. :-) Thanks, A. and Sidharth. Great thread...


Home / Undergraduate / What you would name a story of your life until now - Emerson Supplemental Essay