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Non-Academics That I Have Learned Through Academics University of Texas at Austin App Essay


mack1738 3 / 3 4  
Sep 28, 2015   #1
Prompt: Considering your lifetime goals, discuss how your current and future academic and extra-curricular activities might help you achieve your goals.

Non-Academics That I Have Learned Through Academics
I have been in an academic race my entire life. My father set a stern example,
earning several advanced degrees before turning 21. Although today a
successful entrepreneur, my brother was easy to surpass, his attendance was
horrific in high school and he dropped out of college after his first semester.
My sister, on the other hand, kept me on my toes. Her grades in high school
allowed her to get into one of the best colleges in my state. This has given me
very high expectations to live up to.
While this everlasting race is stressful, it has helped me in tremendous ways.
If I did not have this competitiveness I do not think I would have excelled so
much in academics and extracurriculars. This competition has been my motive to
take honors, AP, and college level classes.
I am grateful that I overachieved as this will help me in the future. With
dreams of becoming a psychiatrist, I understand I will have to go through many
more years of education. This competitiveness will allow me to do my best
throughout these years. My motive has helped me excel in a way that will allow
me to get into a wonderful school and begin studying what I am passionate
about.
In the short term, my current academics will allow me to be prepared for
college courses. But in the long term, I will always strive to be my best.
Despite the career, striving for self-efficacy is a quality that will take me
anywhere in life. I have found this fire in me through my academics in high
school and have used this tool in everything I do. Not only in school but in my
extracurriculars as well. In high school cheerleading, I ran for captain to
make my team the best team that we could be. I achieved this through numerous
hours of practice and team bonding. In my competitive cheerleading I strove to
be the best I could when my team won second place in a world wide competition-
The Summit.
Along with this strive for self-efficacy, I have found how to hold myself
accountable. This will help me in any career as well. When my grades suffer, I
know it is because I did not study enough. When my cheerleading team lost a
competition I knew it was because I did not throw my back tuck. When something
goes wrong in my workplace, I will be able to take accountability for it. I
understand that if one does not take accountability than they cannot remedy the
situation.
The principals that I live by will allow me to teach my morals to patients
struggling mentally. I believe these qualities are essential to a clear state
of mind. I have learned these morals through my academic career because I have
always been competitive within my family.
anggicaroot 20 / 19 3  
Sep 30, 2015   #2
Haloo.. let me try to give you some advices

-Although today he become a successful entrepreneur, my brother was easy to surpass, - (so sorry i cannot understand about this line)
his attendancewashorrificinat high school was probably horrificanddue to the fact after that he was automatically dropped out of college afterhis in first semester. On the other hand, my sister, on the other hand kept me on my toes. Her grades in high school allowed her to get into one of the best colleges in my state . She obtained the best colleges in my city. This has given me very high expectations to live up to. It is the main reason which i could acquire a wide range of expectations for my live.

This is my correction .. i suggest you to improve your ability on complex sentence

Keep writing ;)
justivy03 - / 2,366 607  
Oct 4, 2015   #3
@Mack, running through your essay, I believe there are a lot of improvement to be done.
So here's my help for the first two paragraphs and I'll get back to you for the rest of the essay.

- If I did not have this competitivenesscompetition
- I do notdon't think...
- ...excelled so much in academics and extracurriculars.
- This competition has been my motivemotivation

- I am grateful that I overachievedhave strived and achieved enough in order to have a solid foundation as...
- ThisMy competitivenessnature will allow me to do my best
- My motiveinspiration has helped
- ...to get into a wonderful schoolrenowned institution and begin..

There you have it @Mack, I hope this helps.
I'll get back to you for the rest of the essay.
harshini elath 1 / 2 1  
Oct 12, 2015   #4
If I did not have this competitiveness I do not think I would have excelled so
much
in academics and extracurriculars. This competition has been my motive motivated me to
take honors, AP, and college level classes.

But in the long term, I will always strive to be my best. the best I can.

I have found this fire in me through my academics in high
school and have used this tool use any other more suitable word in everything I do.

This is my correction...


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