Norway is multicultural; University of Washington - short response, International freshman

Hi everyone! I am from Norway, and its a dream of mine to go to u-dub. This is the short response essay (250 - 500 words) . I really feel like it still needs a lot of work.. Please be as critical as possible, i need all the help i can get! :)

Thank you!

1. The University of Washington seeks to create a community of students richly diverse in cultural backgrounds, experiences, and viewpoints. How would you contribute to this community?

Being an international student applier, I have a lot to contribute with when it comes to university high seeking a diverse cultural community. Having a different history and being used to a different way of life makes me a great contribution to the university of Washington community.

Norway is a multicultural country. Many refugees and people seeking a better life immigrate to Norway. Having been surrounded by people from many different religions and countries all my life have had an important say to who I am today. It have opened up my mind to different cultures and made me curious about what others believe and how they live their life. I am not religious myself; however I do celebrate the Christian holidays as Easter, Christmas with more. Why my family and I do so without believing in Christianity, is because of tradition. Norway's culture is based upon the Lutheran Church, and the traditions and rituals from the religion have been preserved and are still conducted to this day by Norwegians.

I spent a year aboard as an exchange student living with a conservative Jewish family. My host father was of Jewish origin and my host mother had converted into Judaism from the Catholic Church. This thought me a lot about the Jewish belief and what they go through and what they do on a daily basis. The family thought me a lot about the Jewish holidays and values. Also, I learned a lot about what it is like to convert from a religion to another hearing about my host mother's experiences.

Because of the diverse community of University of Washington, I will be able to share my story and my culture with other students, and learn about other people's viewpoints and how they are connected to other cultures. I will be able to share my experiences of living in a multicultural country and being an exchange student with an American Jewish family.

What do you have to contribute? Your Norwegian heritage? Your multi-cultured background? Your experiences with different religions? Clearly state what unique things you can contribute right in the beginning. You cannot afford to be vague and unconvincing in the first paragraph of your essay.

Overall comments:
The raw materials are all here. Excellent work! Refine your intro, and you'll be good to go.

~amorphous1