All responses are deeply appreciated.
Let me know what you think; there's a 500 word limit, and I was more or less caught between craft of composition and actual depth of content.
Please tell us what led you to select both your anticipated academic area(s) of study and the NYU school / college / program or the Abu Dhabi campus. What interests you most about your intended discipline? Mention any extracurricular or non-school-related activities or experiences that demonstrate your interest.
As dozens of journals, notebooks, letters and text files will reveal, writing has been my pursuit. Be it fiction or otherwise, composing emotions, cares, concerns, and all else into literary form evokes a fulfillment no other field and few hobbies can parallel.
Psychology, however, is a focus driven by my innate interest for others. With age I've grown increasingly fascinated by human nature, while my own former psychosis particularly drove my love for the study and empathy for the mentally ill.
Seclusion is one of my greatest fears. I cringe at the thought of living in ignorance, so naturally I crave diversity. I want to experience and empathize and learn broadly.
Luckily I have little to fret over. In the jambalaya of NY's melting pot live both the trial and empirical lessons of diversification; NYU accompanies such enlightenment with opportunities to progress one's knowledge and prowess in the vast context of the world.
I'm going to college to learn, but the lessons merely begin at the desk.
I could read his biography. I could read five of his biographies or I could skim James Joyce's Wikipedia entry.
But I want his words. No company could parallel Joyce's own; I would meet the remarkable mind myself.
It's a one-wish sort of thing, and I wouldn't waste it. I'd indulge. In reality, I can make my own fate. If I want to deeply enough, I will.
So we'd dip into one of my dreams, the kind so impossibly perfect all you can want is to share it with someone.
Thank you! I'll try to help out with some of your essays as well.
What you wrote is really good; it's convincing and shows your personal interest.
I'm not sure about the "can want" at the end of the last answer though.It doesn't sound right.
Can you please take a look at my essays? :)
1. So are you pursuing English or Pyschology? I'm confused and I think NYU might be as well...And then you haphazardly mention that you "used" to be pyschotic, which isn't exactly an endorsement! Haha. Pick one, or explain that you're pursuing both. Tone down the wordiness in your English portion. Talk about extra curriculars. I'm applying to NYU as well, and it's hard with the 500 character limit, but do your best to be clear!!
2. The second paragraph is similarly confusing. I appreciate the need for diversification. But each sentence seems relatively unconnected to the other. Work towards transitions and specifics. If you want to be a writer, comprehensive answers are kinda sorta vital.
3. Again, relatively cluttered. You have all these wonderful ideas, and they're all well written, but there's little cohesion!! Tone it down a notch, take away some of the superfluous words, and try again. You'll get it, I have faith. I'll post a response I got for my NYU essays that really helped me!!
Thank you everyone. I'm currently revising, I'll take a look at your own threads soon.
I know it is hard with the 500 character limit to answer these questions, I too applied to NYU, but I feel as though all of your answers are kind of pompous and you tend to show off a lot. Instead of using those large words, NYU would rather you take up their 500 character limit describing you more than using beautiful language. If NYU was looking to see how well you can write they would look at your essay, which doesn't have a limit. But since they give you only so many characters to use, take advantage of that by writing about yourself rather than showing off your skills.
