NYU Supplement (trait+New York City)

I need someone to look over these before I send them in.
It's a 500 character limit so they might seem a little choppy.

Describe a trait or characteristic that has been passed along to you by your family. Tell us why you like or dislike this aspect of yourself.

A trait that has been passed onto me by my family is my persistence. When I set my sights on something I continue to pursue it until I achieve it. I dislike this quality about myself because it causes me to lose focus of the greater picture. When this happens I have to force myself to step back and reevaluate what my goal is, why I am trying to achieve it, and how it will contribute to my long-term goal. Through dealing with my persistence I have learned the importance of self evaluation.

New York City is an essential element of academic and cultural life at NYU. If you could engage in an activity or start a club or service organization at NYU, what would it be and how would you envision it impacting the larger community?

If I could start a service organization at NYU it would be a community outreach program that would allow teenagers, age 13-18, of all socioeconomic backgrounds to come and participate in a forum in which the can discuss their thoughts and ideas on issues that are important to them. It would have a strong impact on the community because it would teach and allow for teenagers to advocate for themselves and learn to better articulate their opinions on different topics that matter to them.

You have been selected to sing in a talent show. What song would you choose? Why?

If I could sing any song in a talent show, I would sing "Eye of The Tiger" by Survivor. I would choose to sing this song for several reasons: it is very well known, it is extremely entertaining, and everybody loves to hear that magnificent guitar solo in the beggining of the song. For me Eye of the Tiger represents the attitude that people should have when going up against adversity. They should be determined, focused, and passionate about what they want.

Please tell us what led you to select your anticipated academic program and/or NYU school/college, and what interests you most about your intended discipline.

My junior year of high school I had an amazing AP Psychology teacher. Her name was Amy Hill and she taught the class in such a hands on way that I couldn't help but fall in love with the subject of Psychology. Eventually I want to be able to apply Psychology to helping police officers and soldiers who have been through traumatizing situations. What interests me the most about psychology is how powerful emotions are and how much of an effect they have on our every day lives.

THANKS FOR YOUR HELP!

Great short answers. A few really minor spelling and grammatical points:

because it causes me to lose focus on the greater picture

participate in a forum in which they can discuss their thoughts

helping police officers and soldiers who have been through traumatic situations

When this happens, I have to force myself to step back and reevaluate my purpose , why I am trying to achieve it, and how it will contribute to my long-term goal.

Use quote marks for the song:
For me "Eye of the Tiger" represents the attitude that people should have when going up against adversity. They should be determined, focused, and passionate about what they want.

I remember that song from Karate Kid!! Great song, great movie... and this is a great writing sample for the college. You will do well, I bet!

Thanks for your help! I sent my supplement in for NYU the other day!