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Optional essay, Aerospace Engineering


Backes27 2 / 10  
Jan 15, 2009   #1
This is an optional essay about my future goals and ambitions.

The little boy stands still, mesmerized by the momentous size of the jet. He
wonders, "How can something that enormous, take off and fly?" I was that little
boy, staring at the latest Boeing jet being exhibited at the air show. Standing
next to that jet made me wonder what it took to design and develop airplanes. I
decided to choose Aerospace Engineering as an academic path. I chose it due to
my love for math and science, and for the pure thirst I have for airplanes.

At my school, I took the toughest classes available to me. Math and science
always held my attention because I was able to think critically. In my physics
class, I enjoy taking a math concept and applying it to the everyday world.
Someday, I hope to take a math concept and apply it to the design of a future
airplane. I have the drive to challenge myself and a strong desire to pursue my
aspirations. I do not want to be one an average kid who take classes
I know I can score high in. I receive great satisfaction from pushing
myself, even if I don't get that perfect A. In my opinion, I believe that this
prepares me better for the future. My "never-do-it-easy" mentality and personal
interests push me to fulfill my dream of becoming an Aerospace Engineer.
ULL 3 / 18  
Jan 15, 2009   #2
what air show... exhibition location: ...exihited at the air show in the Wisconson jet museum?; note, it is not a real museum..:}

I chose it because of my love for math....

everything else is really good. nice job... the above comment can be omitted if you want. best wishes..
OP Backes27 2 / 10  
Jan 15, 2009   #3
Ive been to air shows in different states and i lived on a few Air Force Bases. Thats why i didnt put a specific one, to hard to pick only one.
ULL 3 / 18  
Jan 15, 2009   #4
I see, than your good to go... but maybe wait for another person to look at you paragraphs...
EF_Sean 6 / 3,491  
Jan 16, 2009   #5
"Someday, I hope to take a math concept and apply it to the design of a future
airplane." I'm guessing that designing any sort of airplane requires many, many mathematical concepts.

"I do not want to be one an average kid who takes classes I know I can score high in."

You tell a lot about yourself in the second paragraph. Maybe you could demonstrate some of these traits through specific anecdotes?
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Jan 16, 2009   #6
I guess i think the first paragraph is sort of cliche and stereotypical for this kind of essay. The image of a little kid, and then saying "that little boy was me..." is a little stereotypical and unoriginal. Can you start with some deep insight that you have had into aviation, perhaps giving the reader a glimpse of that passion as it is today -- more sophisticated.

Here is an idea:

At my school, I chose the toughest...

The second paragraph is great!
EF_Sean 6 / 3,491  
Jan 17, 2009   #7
Starting out with a current insight you have into aviation is a great idea. You could then trace the development of that particular insight, rather than giving a general history of how you came to like aviation, which would make your essay really stand out.


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