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"no pains, no gains" - from Taiwan to America; "my world" - rough draft


annininie 1 / -  
Nov 16, 2010   #1
i would be really appreciate for any corrections! Thanks(:

Prompt#1 Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.

Back when I was a child, I had a dream. Because of American films sake, I always wanted to come to America this big country and experience a different life style one day. Yet I never thought this day would come by so fast that I couldn't believe it was real at that moment. In the blink of an eye, I have already been and lived in the United States for two years. When I recall this time period, I grew up a lot. Honestly, I feel like I'm doing mission impossible all the time. Everything in America is a challenge to me because we have nothing in common. We have different backgrounds, different cultures, and even different educations. Apparently, we have different point of views of looking at things. I already have a bi-cultural background since I was born in Taiwan because my grandparents were born and raised in China. Since I was a kid, I have experienced Chinese culture and Taiwanese culture. Additionally, after moving to America, I am still trying to find a balance between these three cultures. This has given me an in-depth opportunity to broaden my horizons.

There is an old saying says, "no pains, no gains." I finally realized why this is an unchanging truth since ancient times after I moved to the U.S. I was too innocent to think that everything related to me is not going to change. But I was wrong, for me, the most significant change is the friendship I have had before. This was a big blow to me because the friends in Taiwan were just like my family. However, all I can do is to adjust my attitude. I tried not to look back and regret because I have chosen to come to the U.S. I have an expectation that one day I can also find my own piece of heaven in America. Also, my parents have lost something in order to let their children have better education. My parents separated in different country because my father has to stay in Taiwan taking care of my grandparents, and my mother has to stay here taking care of my brother and me. They also use their whole life earning just to give my bother and me a good life here. I really appreciate God has given such wonderful parents and guided me through any hard time, so this motivates myself to work hard and not to disappoint them.

I've never regret about coming to the U.S. because life ought to be full of surprise. One thing really surprised me is that I never thought I can be a helper here. I thought I was the one who most needed to be helped. In math class, I assist my classmates solving math problems. Last year, I was working as an volunteer in a hospital, such as helping patients move to various departments. These have not only built up my confidence, but also bring me enjoyment and satisfaction. Comparing the old me in Taiwan to the new me in America, every effort I put it here earns twice much than in Taiwan. There are difficulties around us all the time, it just all about the attitude we have. As the Cathay Pacific Airways motto says, "There is no limit to where [I] can go."

555 words
iceui2 - / 70  
Nov 16, 2010   #2
I think it would be more beneficial for you to show this to your English teacher and ask him/her to make some corrections. Good luck!
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Nov 26, 2010   #3
I'll add some commas here:
I always wanted to come to America, this big country, and experience a different lifestyle one day.

I' like to add " " marks here: I feel like I'm doing "mission impossible" all the time. -----cool! :-)

Everything in America is a challenge to me because we America and I have nothing in common. We have different ...----By personifying America, you make the essay very interesting!

:-)

e three cultures. This has given me an in-depth opportunity to broaden my horizons.

There is an old saying says, "no pain, no gain ."

You don't have to "regret about"... just "regret"
I've never regret about coming to the U.S. because life ought to be full of surprises .

You are very creative!


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