Share an experience through which you have gained respect for intellectual, social, or cultural differences. Comment on how your personal experiences and achievements would contribute to the diversity of the University of Michigan.
Papua New Guinean-born Filipino-Nigerian that's me. A person with two cultures (Nigerian and Filipino) in one. However - being born and having lived in Papua New Guinea my entire life, with the exception of brief vacations to the Philippines and Nigeria ï the Papua New Guinean culture is a part of me and I consider myself a third Papua New Guinea, a third Filipino, and a third Nigerian. These different cultures within me make it difficult for me to understand how even very minor segregation can occur and also enable me to end minor segregation.
The year was 2007 and I was in my freshman year back in Papua New Guinea. My class was filled with Filipinos and Papua New Guineans and groups were formed depending on the language you primarily spoke ï the Filipinos, Tagalog, and the Papua New Guineans, Pidgin. These groups annoyed me not only because I had friends in both groups but because I could not understand why these groups had formed: to some extent, I can speak both Pidgin and Tagalog and I am not forming groups within myself!
Therefore, I had to join these groups together. Bringing my friends from each group together, differences were laid down and friendships were formed, cultures were exchanged. Now, every student in my previous class in Papua New Guinea are friends with each other and most can speak, to some extent, both Pidgin and Tagalog.
This bringing together of cultures is who I am, partly because I am three cultures in one but mostly because I hate seeing and experiencing separations between people due to cultural differences. Therefore, I would not only add diversity to the University of Michigan through my appreciation and willingness to befriend people from different cultures but also reduce diversity, in a sense, by bringing people of different cultures together and enabling an exchange of cultures to occur.
In point of view, you answer only a part of the prompt. You do talk about "..how your personal experiences and achievements would contribute to the diversity of the University of Michigan", but never in the essay do I see how you gained respect for any of intellectual, cultural or social differences.
You said that you brought people from different groups together enabling a cultural exchange, but how did that help you respect their qualities?
Even later you describe who you are, but you don't really describe the RESPECT you gained for them. By respect I mean any kind of liking or appreciation or something you thought you didn't like but later did.
That is my opinion. I suggest you get it checked from more people.
Good luck.
Ya, I agree with the above.
You should talk more about how it has affected you. How has this experienced changed you?
Ok I just need one clarification. Does the question mean how the differences received more respect from me or how I gained respect for having the social, intellectual, cultural differences?
Thank you both for what you said I just figured out a new essay.
THIS IS MY NEW VERSION:
Share an experience through which you have gained respect for intellectual, social, or cultural differences. Comment on how your personal experiences and achievements would contribute to the diversity of the University of Michigan.
"Michael! The driver's here!" my brother shouted over the chatter of the students. I rushed over to him, ceasing my 8th grade prefect after-school responsibility of patrolling the playground and toilet area, and apprehending potential troublemakers. The Papua New Guinea sun beat down on me, and sweat flowed down my temples as I ran towards my brother; however, I knew I was forgetting something.
I reached my brother, walked leisurely to the car, pulled open the car door, sat down, and relaxed. My eyelids became heavy and everything went dark.
"We're home, wake up!" my brother shouted. I picked up my bag and hopped off the car. The car drove off toward the compound's gate as my brother and I walked toward the house. A jingle was heard and I reached into my pocket and pulled out the vice-principal's master school key, which he gave me to lock the toilets after school ended. I dropped my bag and sprinted after the car.
The car had already left the compound and accelerated farther up the street. People on the sidewalk saw me chasing after the car and began to run with me, flagging down and shouting at the driver. The driver reached the end of the street and slowed to a stop. There was a group of about twenty people I had never met beside me, panting. I thanked them, appreciated their act of sincere kindness, and gained a new sense of respect for the Papua New Guinean people.
This act of sincere kindness certainly increased my kindness to people I do not know and I would certainly contribute to the diversity of University of Michigan by showing kindness to anyone, regardless of race, gender, etc. Hopefully the kindness I give will change others, just how the kindness I received changed me.
Can anyone give any advice on how to shorten it to 250 words? Thanks
No no. It still doesn't jump out. It is really only that one line in this essay, in the 3rd paragraph, that hints at the change it wrought in you.
Somehow I feel the initial bit on describing the event is too detailed. Well, the question does want a fairly detailed experience, but your description is very tangential. Try avoiding small and insignificant instances. Because this is supposed to be a short essay, see if you can jump straight to the change in you, with only about 2 lines of IMPORTANT context before it.
Good luck.
Thanks prompter that short answer really did suck. I am writing another one lol
HOW CAN I POST MY??? HELPP
xlcyx you have to click on new thread then copy and paste your document into the text box then post it.
