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"My parents" - my academic background


Olaoluwa 4 / 6  
Sep 9, 2010   #1
The world I come From

Coming from an average background were they had to earn everything themselves, my parents have always pushed me towards academic success. They have always emphasized on the need for focus, hard work and determination.

Before starting my secondary education, my parents gave me various classes of speeches. They advised me not to waste the opportunity I had because they did not have the luxury of going to a high classed school when they were much younger. They believed that I had academic potential and if I was able to effectively utilize my opportunities, I would be catapulted to unimaginable heights.

Still just in my junior year in high school, I viewed their continuous advices as overzealous and extravagant. My junior was full of academic excellence. I was able to attain eleven distinctions in my NECO examinations (a national examination taking by students in year 9). My parents were proud of me but didn't give me any form of preferential treatment. Instead they advised not to relent in my efforts.

I received praise from my teachers for my academic performance. It was then I realized that it wasn't my parents receiving the praise, it was me. Though, my parents kept pushing me towards excellence, I realized that they were hardly going to be praised for my performance.

My senior year began and I became very diligent and serious in my academics. I wrote my final exams and was able to achieve all credits in my exams. During my valedictory service, I received awards for my academic performance. I noticed that everyone including my parents was clapping for me. My parents never received any award for my performance; the awards were all presented to me.

My parents' initial extravagant advices have now become my guide towards academic success. Most of the decisions I make today are greatly influenced by my parents. I no longer view my parents only as people who merely care for me but also as two parallel forces gradually leading me to my ultimate success. Their discerning advices laid the foundation of my academic background.
Nnadozie 3 / 6  
Sep 9, 2010   #2
Coming from an average background were I had to earn everything themselves,
your referring to yourself so don't deviate.
OP Olaoluwa 4 / 6  
Sep 9, 2010   #3
i am talking about my parents so i think its they
mea505 - / 265  
Sep 9, 2010   #4
You are quite right. Just change the "were" to "where."

Mark
atul - / 1  
Sep 9, 2010   #5
The society is facing problems with such laws. This has to go legal
and it's needed to be sorted at the earlier.

john
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Sep 10, 2010   #6
Your first paragraph is very short, and you have an opportunity to make the essay much better. Please add a sentence to the first paragraph and make it a sentence that says something about this notion that your accomplishments seemed like your parents accomplishments and that you went through a process that enabled you to discover your own work and accomplishment as different from theirs.

See what I mean? Add a sentence to that first para to tell readers that this essay is going to show how you learned to become your own person and discern your accomplishments from those of your parents.

You write very well, and I need more help from you! As a bilingual person, you can help a lot of people. Please spend MORE time when you comment on someone else's essay. You often just write a single line, and it is not very helpful! Now that I see how well you write, I know you are able to be more helpful. So, please give a few lines of feedback to someone on the "unanswered" list. That is your homework. :-)


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