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Parents and Pastors - AppplyTexas essay topic A

James1135 1 / 2 1  
Oct 12, 2018   #1
If y'all could take a look at my

application essay for Texas A&M

and give me any critiques I'd greatly appreciate it.

Family. The one thing that can greatly determine the outlook that one has on life. My parents instilled positive and honest values upon me. Without these parents and values they gave me I wouldn't be where I'm at today; applying for college. My family has shaped me into becoming a honest and hard working man.

Growing up with parents that were prior youth pastors changes the way you grow up compared to a typical child in the United States. My parents always taught me to never do anyone wrong, incorporating honesty as best as they could into everyday situations. As a child we were at CVS and my brother and I stole a pack of gum and hid it, but much to our dismay our mother found it. She insisted that we go back to the store admit our wrongs and pay for the gum with our own money from our piggy banks. My mom taught me something very critical in life that day, honesty. Honesty will get you places, people respect an honest person and therefore will think of them in a superior way.

My parents have always taught me to have a positive outlook on life. A pessimist will often struggle to make great achievements that can further advance them in life. My parents always said, "a positive attitude can lead to great success and happiness." I totally believe this, i found that having a positive attitude when I'm working in the sweltering Texas heat will get me places instead of just taking the easy way out and not doing the work. The teaching of always having a positive helped me to easily overcome the everyday affairs in life that I had. Many decide to take the easy way out and not handle some of their problems but I always think of the positive and it has greatly helped me become happier. Positive thinking is essential in everyday life.

Being a young adult I don't know everything but my parents have definitely given me a boost in the way they raised me up and I believe it has considerably helped me in life. The everyday lessons that I received from doing wrong in everyday activities has greatly helped me in life. The environment people are raised in greatly influences their everyday actions and thoughts.

Holt - / 7,529 2001  
Oct 12, 2018   #2
Hi Logan. This is a very simple but clearly informative and endearing essay. You successfully explained how your family's religious background grounded your beliefs in life. Your mother's influence also showcases how you developed a strength of character. I'm just wondering why your father does not figure in your essay at all. Since you mentioned that your parents were youth pastors, I would have liked to have learned how your father influenced and shaped some other aspect of your personality, belief system, or strength of character. Is it too late to add that to the essay? It would help to equalize the influence that your parents had on you when it came to shaping who you are today. Maybe insert that as the new third paragraph of your essay? Don't get me wrong, the essay is good, but I feel it is not very well balanced in terms of telling the reviewer what your background is. You did not indicate that you were raised by a single parent so the "father' aspect of the discussion is expected and should somehow be reflected in your response.
OP James1135 1 / 2 1  
Oct 13, 2018   #3
Thanks for the critiques

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