Why Swarthmore?
Please write a brief statement telling us why you have decided to apply to Swarthmore in particular. 2000 characters
Please tell me if this answers the prompt and if there's any grammatical mistakes. :)
The intertwining trunks of the multi-trunked tree are what people first notice or ask about when looking out my window. These trunks, I would proudly explain, represent how each of the family members wraps around each other in support. Beyond this tree, one also sees the edge of a forest-where my love for biology began by collecting plant specimens and bugs and observing the fauna. The forest and the tree are two important pieces of me, and I wondered if I would leave them.
I realized I did not have to when I discovered Swarthmore that possesses the two pieces that complete my being. I was intrigued by the kinship between students. Although the college has only 1,500 undergraduates, it is diverse. In a community of international, Asian, Latin, African, and Native American students, each student is a socially and culturally diverse individual. Each Swattie is an individual trunk and together, they make up the Swarthmore tree. As a part of the 17 percent of Asians in this tree, I would be able to contribute my own Korean heritage, culture, and intellectual experiences to this unique community while opening my cultural and social awareness. But most importantly, I would be a part of Swarthmore's intellectually engaging atmosphere of communal learning.
However, Swarthmore's most fascinating part is the nearby Crum Woods. To take courses that actively worked with the Crum Woods and to pursue research in such biotic diversity is what truly distinguishes Swarthmore from other colleges. Incorporating modernity with opportunity, Swarthmore would allow me to embark on projects in conjunction with the Crum Woods, using up-to-date equipment at Hughes and Speare under the guidance of knowledgeable faculty members. During the summer, I could also work with faculty members from the Division of the Natural Science and Engineering through the Bailyn Summer Research Fellowship or intern through the EDEN program to learn research techniques In addition, Swarthmore's broad range of biological disciplines would enable me to synthesize my interest in Cellular and Molecular Biology with Organismal Biology into one major. To augment and expand my studies in these areas, I could attend the Biology Lecture Series at the Science Center and listen to, for instance, David Page on sex chromosomes.
To be in such a close-knit, diverse community and flourish academically are why I want to be a part of the Swarthmore tree.
Will Edit your essay if you reply
I think it's pretty cool how you compare yourself to the trees. I agree with Lauren, you should maybe briefly explain what the NSE is, but if it is a pretty well-know thing at the school then you might not, because the Admissions Office will probably know. In addition, it is not too generic, but you could be more specific on what else Swarthmore has to offer (ie. maybe study abroad, internships, the diverse community, etc.) Overall good job :)
--> Also please look at my Illinois essays, THANKS.
Your third paragraph is amazing in my opinion. It works so well. Second one isn't as eye popping cause some parts may sound generic but your unique approach makes it solid enough.
I discovered Swarthmore that possesses the two pieces that complete my being.
"I discovered Swarthmore, WHICH posses these two pieces that complete my being."
was intrigued by the kinship between students.
You can definitely make this alot stronger.
Overall, a very solid metaphor and theme you have throughout. It makes me want to go to Swarthmore now haha.
