"Photography is a slice of ephemeral tranquility" - Brief description of one activity

The prompt is to briefly elaborate on one activity. I wanted to create an eclectic yet poignant expression of my passion for photography and its possibilities.

Grammar errors? Incoherency? Clear sentence structure?

Photography is a slice of ephemeral tranquility served alongside a silky smooth wave of chills. It is the astuteness renowned within every sense and concurrently flushed through the fingertips onto a screen. The meek yet majestic and ever precedent essence of pressing a dime-sized button rescinds reticently into ineffability. Any awareness and response reposed within myself has now been apprehended and restored within a single still-motion depiction of each. The task of disclosing the personally affiliated emotions within and external to the picture is felicitously sustained in a laconic preamble. This introduction survives as a cacophony rising above the dilettantes hovering in niches of dimly lit art galleries and cozy dorm rooms. Between the lines exclusive, autonomous opinion and feeling burgeon.

It is impossible to not include myself in this amalgamation of perspectives; nevertheless, the picture resembles not "I" or any emotion I had anteceding the shoot but the infinite universality of a viewer's freedom of observation. Taking into custody an idea arbitrarily inspired by human reality and transcribing a blithe imagination into "art" is the single most unfettering, yet creatively unifying activity. The comfort in exposing fervor without the common associations expectantly presupposed allows the life of the photograph to exist with omnipresence; the photograph is poignant and sensitive to the viewer, allowing amities to grow. Photography is the anchor man on mute; a pellucid pathos beneath light; the transcendence of human emotion void of commonality and exposure of individual surreptitiousness.

The biggest problem is simply the word choice. Maybe lighten up on the high caliber vocabulary. It will probably get your descriptions across in a more coherent way. I also think that there are too many complex sentences. Vary it up a bit? Shorter ones are good for clarification.

On a positive note, I can really sense the passion for photography in this essay!

Thank you! I agree that verbosity outweighs simplicity in this essay. That is my main problem in every essay that I write. I will definitely re-read and tone down the vocabulary.

Much easier to read and understand this time. I think it's great. I definitely understand why you do it and how it makes you feel, but I'm just wondering if the college is looking for more of the where, when, who or what you like to photograph.

Please read my essays :)