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'my physics class' - Stanford admission (What matters to you and why?)


Ladyloki 1 / 1  
Jan 1, 2012   #1
Okay, so this is the final essay I've been working on...and I did it kind of fast...and I've had terrible writer's block O.O...so please, if you could offer any suggestions at all, they would be greatly appreciated. TEAR THE BUGGER APART IF YOU HAVE TO!! Thank you for your time an effort in coming to my aid ^.^

Had this question been posed to me a few years prior to this I would have had but one reply, my grade point average and nothing more, save, perhaps, presenting myself as some sort of superhuman android. Throughout my time in high school, I have battled with self-doubt, self-pity and even self-loathing. I have tried my medal by forcing myself over the edge and back. From my efforts I have gained a strength not to be reckoned with; however, after a while, I began to lose myself to the pseudo-perfectionistic ideals I had so championed.

No longer can I describe myself as such a shell. For, in an instant, my entire system was altered. I received an A- in a class that, throughout, had proven my favorite. For a while, I was distraught, feeling a failure. However, I knew quite well, that I had learned a great deal in that class. I strove to learn all that I could and while I had made a few vital errors, a reality dawned. It was from those errors that my desire grew and it was such a desire that my overall understanding grew. That particular class, my physics class, instilled back into me the principle I had so yearned for as a child and as I entered school. Above all else, I had cherished not grades, but the growth of intellect and worldly understanding.

Do not misunderstand me, grades still prove a driving force, but the knowledge that lies behind the letter is far greater a prize for me.
22kcox 5 / 22  
Jan 1, 2012   #2
Good! But i think you should address the "why" part of the prompt more clearly. plus I think you have plenty of characters left. why not use them all?
OP Ladyloki 1 / 1  
Jan 1, 2012   #3
Hmm, you're right. I do have plenty of characters left...I didn't really realize it xD Thank you ^.^


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