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"pirates find x" -- UChicago prompt


lullabywave 5 / 14  
Jan 3, 2011   #1
Hello everyone! This is my last supplement suckers!
no but really, please help me make it my best!! Any help is appreciated (I know it's long). BUT for anyone who helps out I help you back with your 30+ page paper ok? Please? I promise it'll be really fun to read mine!

Instructions/guidelines:
This is your chance to play, analyze (don't agonize), create, compose - let us hear the result of your thinking about something that interests you, in a voice that is your own.

Choose one of the five extended essay options, indicate your choice, and write a one- or two-page response.

Draw on your best qualities as a writer, thinker, visionary, social critic, sage, citizen of the world, or future citizen of the University of Chicago; take a little risk and have fun.

Essay Option 1. Find x.
Inspired by Benjamin Nuzzo, an admitted student from Eton College, UK

I wish to present to you a familiar scene: on the hottest day of the year, the sun stays pinned in the middle of the sky, continuously pouring a staggering heat onto our world. The only indication of life comes from energetic cicadas as they sing their cacophony unperturbed. Meanwhile, two young surface dwellers have no alternatives to taking up their present horizontal positions on one backyard porch. Together, they battle the midday heat with stillness. The swelter is so severe, even the air is still. Suddenly, a small disturbance ripples its way over to the porch and with its arrival comes true bliss; today, the wind is God. Any lingering thought of school has long been absent. Indeed, it was the best of times, and it was the worst of times. What would the two young friends do, suppressed by the sun, but restless for adventure? All is forgotten when both their phones start vibrating.

Their screens reveal the same thing: a map of their town that fills up the screen. A notification box displays the same command: "X marks the spot!" As in "You should know the rest."

There is so much said with so few words. Here, we have a clichéd phrase most often heard in childhood, and the tone of an unknown sender borders mockery. Though not qualified to be called old, the two comrades are beyond the age of playing pirates, yet the event itself is mysterious; could these two people do anything outside exactly what the message instructs? No. The friends are now the two treasure hunters on a quest to find x. They brave the day's calefaction for the sake of buried riches.

"I think I'm hallucinating."

"Not necessarily. When there is a significant difference in temperature between layers of air, light bends, creating a reflection of the sky which resembles the image of still water."

"Wow! I never knew there were dancing mushrooms in the sky."

And so, with suspicious origins, and the questionable reliability of those about to embark, a journey with an unpredictable outcome begins.

It takes the rest of the day for them to finally find x as indicated on the electronic map. When they arrive, their phone batteries are drained of life, and the treasure hunters themselves are clinging to the last bits of energy they have left. The most incredible part, however, is that they stuck to their mission the whole time. They are a determined duo, but they could never have come this far on their own. Alone, the task is not only difficult, but also boring. The comrades kept each other focused and motivated each other in the continuous battle against the sun. Both know that there is no real treasure to be found; they've known this since the beginning and while probably not on a conscious level, they realized the fact as children as well. Neither has ever expected precious metals or coveted jewels at the end of their play, but they still play.

Even more interesting is that "the history shelves contain few solid cases where pirates buried treasure and practically none involving maps" (Cecil Adams). Still, mysterious maps and buried treasure have become such an active part of American culture both inside and outside of child's play. As a treasure hunter, what attracts me isn't the end result, but the initial curiosity and the ensuing journey - an intimate secret that is the map only the two of us know about. Faced with such an opportunity, could anyone really not want to find x? It could be anything. The treasure isn't necessarily at the indicated location. You can find x at the ice cream shop you had been too lazy to go to or a cool, dark movie theater in which you fall asleep until everyone else has left and the usher has to kick you out. The treasure map is only an instigator; the real treasure is found by the hunter.
ItsokaytoGaga 15 / 96  
Jan 3, 2011   #2
Hey!

I really like how you presented a narrative and went on to your theme.
And I liked how the map came on their cellphones and not on a parchment blown by a gust. :P :D

I would like to see if you could work about a bit on your title. Its good. But after reading your essay I thought the title could be a little more intriguing itself.

Sorry I can't give you grammar help. I suck at grammar. :/
But I personally enjoyed your essay. So there! Good luck! :)

Please HELP me with mine! :)


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