Unanswered [1] | Urgent [0]

Home / Undergraduate   % width Posts: 2

Pit Orchestra - CommonApp Extracurricular Prompt

ltpvan 5 / 35  
Dec 29, 2010   #1
Please briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities or work experiences

With intense concentration, I lunged forward, my adrenaline rushed along the lively tempo. A sense of accomplishment swept over me as I pushed my embouchure to the limit, alternating between the lowest and highest range through sections of treacherous key signatures. Suddenly, we decrescendo into silence. Enjoying the low brass's warm timbre, I reminisced of the past eight weeks.

Pit orchestra scores are never re-arranged to conform to mediocrity. Every day, I came to practice, determined to overcome the challenges that Broadway musicians have also faced. Pit orchestra has helped to foster me into a solid and more confident musician. The valuable experience not only introduces me to a new area of music but also has taught me that music, like people, has limitless possibilities. My inner world is expresses by music. As my playing improve, I must also improve myself, so that my music shall expresses my feelings and character. (151 words)

Every comments and criticism welcome, especially those concerning structures and grammar. Thanks! :D
simardownn - / 20  
Dec 30, 2010   #2
Besides the errors indicated above. I think it looks good!

Really loved the intro! Very vivid!

The tense change between the 1st and 2nd paragraph. It goes from reminisced to 'are
. Maybe Pit scores never re-arranged...

But then you also use has later on... So make it a consistent tense

Good luck!

Home / Undergraduate / Pit Orchestra - CommonApp Extracurricular Prompt