The point of view in your essay is very interesting, how you have transformed from a careless and flamboyant individual to a humbled and hardworking one is a colossal acheivment, but you have not shown enough passion about it in the part where you described this transition. However, you closing paragraph is quite spirited, seems like you are eager to join UF which is very good, just pump up the first part as well.
There are a few mistakes which i'm pointing out for you:
from this experience I have learned ....
it'll seem better as
my experience...
of random information. You earn it by being ...
information
; you earn...
Most of the time I did not need to take notes or study to do well on the exams. When I moved on to high school however, everything changed.
I did not
even (for emphasis)....do well
in exams.
However,w hen I moved
on to high school
however, everything changed.
I continued to use the same careless habits that had worked for me in middle school.
I continued with my careless habbits that worked for me in middle schooland frustrated that I was not doing well
instead of "that" use "because"
succeed in school I needed to work...
....need
ed ...
hope my feedback helps you, would be good if you post the re-write so that we can see how much you have improved.
Take care :)