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I had been presented with the opportunity to go on a church camping trip. UGA essay


southernbelle 2 / 3  
Jan 4, 2015   #1
Tell us an interesting or amusing story about yourself that you have not already shared in your application. (150-200 words)

I had been presented with the opportunity to go on a church camping trip. In a moment of haste, I agreed to go on the camping trip. As the trip began to approach, I regretted my decision. Expecting the worst, I began to formulate excuses to weasel my way out of the predicament. However, I began thinking; I should make glorious and rich memories that I can carry with me until the day I die while I still could. I decided to go on the camping trip. The fellow church mates that also went on the camping trip were strangers to me, but strangely enough, I found myself engaging in conversation with them. We talked about miscellaneous topics and cracked jokes as if we've known each other for years. Opportunities should not be given up on such miniscule things such as embarrassment. Life should be spent discovering new opportunities. Being close-minded and introverted restricted my way of living, so I have discarded those characteristics.
lynn1997h 3 / 37 4  
Jan 4, 2015   #2
is there a word limit to go with this essay?
OP southernbelle 2 / 3  
Jan 4, 2015   #3
Yes I forgot to add it in. It's 150-200 words!
lynn1997h 3 / 37 4  
Jan 4, 2015   #4
might want to add a few more words about those characteristics help you at the end
sampunk9494 7 / 26 2  
Jan 5, 2015   #5
Feedback:

This story has potential if it is more developed descriptively.

For eg.

As the trip began to approach, I regretted my decision.

Maybe you could include in what thoughts are going through your mind when you regret this decision. Like "I will never able to bond with these church members I hardly know!" or "No one will talk to me during the journey! It's a waste of time!"

Then go on to make a contrast with the actual outcome, how you made new friendships and felt fulfilled from making the trip. The story will be more lively then.

Hope this helps!


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