For years this has been my own goal, and I have taken many of the same approaches as Werther in my effort to become a more accomplished artist. Daily sketches, paintings, and journal entries.
"Daily sketches, paintings, and journal entries." You should make this into an independent clause, and tie the two sentences together with a semi-colon. You could also "cut and paste" the second sentence into the first like so:
"For years this has been my own goal, and I have taken many of the same approaches as Werther - daily sketches, paintings, and journal entries - in my effort to become a more accomplished artist.
gave me the chance to see the ravages of letting one's desires grow out of control.
Hmmm, I'm thinking of ravages as more of a symptom of consequence. "...to see the ravaging consequence of letting one's desires grow out of control" ??
Werther invests himself so deeply in others that he becomes dependent on them to grow and flourish.
It sounds like "they" are the ones who are growing and flourishing.:) How about "...in order to grow and flourish."
This is so good, I almost feel as though I am nit-picking!
Great job. Parker!Your essay was a pleasure to read.
Jeannie