"all processes of creation" - Rice Supp - Why Engineering?

Prompt: With the understanding that the choice of academic school you indicated is not binding, explain why you are applying to that particular school of study.

Paint and brushes were never my strongest allies. They have haunted me ever since my classmate looked at my drawing of an alien starship and confused it for a tree. He thought that the futuristic ray of light being emitted from its bottom surface was a mere tree trunk. Since then, I've only trusted myself with stick figures. The truth is, though, that despite my difficulty sketching anything that involves skills other than ruler-using, I find Art bewitching because of its ability to see the nonexistent and its limitless capacity; it is like throwing a die with an infinite number of faces.

On the other hand, the word logic sounds to me like a bubble gum brand. Every time I think about science, I feel like I'm a five-year-old who has just entered a candy shop: the colorful liquids in the test tubes, the shocking chemical reactions and the hilarious "mad-scientist" hairstyles. In my thirst for numerical knowledge, I drink up information from textbooks and websites while attentively listening to my father's explanations of the weirdest phenomena. I am magnetically attracted to Science because of its coherency, the way everything fits so perfectly. If Art is the never-ending die, then Science is what makes it land on one of its countless surfaces allowing the pawn to move forward.

I have chosen to major in engineering precisely because it satisfies my craving for logic and allows me access to artistic fulfillment. In my perspective, this school of study is all-encompassing, incorporating vision, design and execution. The engineer participates in all processes of creation - from the idea, to the plan, to the solidification - and, like a blacksmith, forges Science and Art into a single tool, setting off to change the world. Aside from the adventurous spirit, the engineer is a multidimensional being who is no longer only focused in studying science, but understands the complexity of our world and how fields of study are intricately connected. Through this interdisciplinary thought, explorers of engineering develop into leaders of many different areas ranging from academia to industry all the way to government.

My passion for engineering always reminds of the story a mouse who got stuck inside a bucket of milk. After beating and scraping the metal with all of his strength in the hope of escaping, he stopped and pondered. He knew that there was no way he could dig a whole through the container before the farmer found out about his little misfortune. Aside from that, all he could think of was that he was bathing in milk - something that came from the cow and made some pretty good butter. From that simple analysis of his situation, he came up with an idea. He started swimming, and swimming, and churning, until that cream turned into butter and he crawled out of the bucket. Logic and creativity had worked side by side.

Such a nice essay. Just one suggestion: I dont see the last paragraph very apt or enough connected with the rest of the essay. Either remove it, or provide a better link to the rest.

Otherwise, your essay was fun, original and interesting to read. Well done!
Could you help me with mine please?

^Is randomness and unpredictability, actually seductive in your opinion?


^I do not understand how just thinking about science, can make you feel this. Perhaps, 'imagine' would be the more appropriate word in this context?


^Do you feel priceless, or is the Mastercard commerical priceless?


^If you are thirsty, you do not gobble. You drink instead, to quench your thirst.
Do you always listen to your father explain while you read textbooks and websites? Always? Because I would have thought that after a while, it can get a bit distracting.


^What are you talking about?


^If you have a craving for logic...then why did you say that logic reminds you of a bubble gum brand?


^O no. How did a light bulb pop out of his head? Did his head explode or something?

*P.S I do not get the relevance of the mouse story. You also do not give enough detail or reasoning as to why you are


Rather, you give a fairly decent narrative, albeit the errors in grammar and content. However, for the most part, the narrative seems relatively ineffective due to it's irrelevance.

Thanks for helping me!
Truthfully, I still see no important connection between the example you offer in your last paragraph and the rest. All I see in the story of the mouse, besides a nice, funny episode to make the essay more original, is the importance of originality and practical ideas in problem solving. Is it just that, or sth more? In any case, you should at least explain with a line why you put that example and how the mouse is similar to you.

As I said, apart of that, the essay is really great, shows all your passion and is witty and fun.
Could you please have a look at my revised version of "why duke"? Thanks in advance.

Logic and creativity had worked side by side. - just this sentence is not enough! Again, elaborate more on this. I know you have added also the first sentence of the paragraph, though the analogy between you and the mouse still leaves me perplexed. Also, your ending should be stronger than this.

I like you essay, if others find the last paragraph non-related, just make a short mention of the mouse somewhere in the previous ones. Then it won't sound as if the story came out of nowhere and you'd have prepared the reader.

Review mine?