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The programming process - Q1 Waterloo AIF - "Why I applied to Waterloo Software Eng and Comp Sci"

wannaB 1 / -  
Feb 9, 2021   #1

Software Engineering and Computer Science programs application

Thank you in advance to anyone who helps me with editing this paragraph I wrote for the following prompt:

Please tell us about your educational goals, your interest in your chosen program(s), and your reasons for applying to the University of Waterloo. If you have applied to more than one program please discuss your interest in each program. (900 character limit)

It can be challenging to adopt the complex thought process of a programmer, but the Software Engineering and Computer Science programs at Waterloo can help me navigate toward that goal. I want to gain knowledge beyond just programming. By learning how humans interact with technology in CS 449 or how software affects the economy in ECE 192, I have every resource to become a well-rounded programmer, as well as achieve my dream of starting a company that helps create accessible websites for other companies. Through the unique cohort system at Waterloo, I can easily network within the classroom and find like-minded individuals who are also passionate about accessibility issues in technology, with whom I can collaborate to create our dream start-up. Furthermore, Waterloo's Concept pre-incubator will allow me to develop this company while supporting me in my full-time studies.

(P.S. This is not a part of my response, but I am having trouble responding to others in the "Unanswered" tab. What do I click to leave feedback?)

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 10,301 3341  
Feb 9, 2021   #2
Since this is a character limited essay, you should not use irrelevant opening sentences such as the one you presented in this essay. You have to make every character count towards informing the reviewer about the purpose of your application, based on the required guidelines. The statement becomes stronger when you start with the purpose of your interest in studying at Waterloo instead. The presentation itself contains relevant information. It informs the reviewer about the purpose of your studies based on known contributions the university makes to their student's learning process. However, the Concept Incubator section is too short. There needs to be additional information presented in that section, which will make clear to the reviewer how you plan to use the program and why it is a special reason for your interest in the university. All the other sections you presented are developed clearly and presented in a manner that moves your presentation forward. The last sentence does not feel fully explained. by removing the unnecessary sentence at the start, you will gain characters to help you achieve a better explanation of that section.

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