Unanswered [6] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Undergraduate   % width Posts: 2


'The Pursuit of Medicine' - Sophie Davis Essay #3


egpctim 5 / 10  
Jan 8, 2012   #1
The prompt is:
3.
To aid the Admissions Committee in learning more about you, please share your current influences and interest for pursuing a career in Medicine/Dentistry.

THANKS!
I WILL RETURN THE FAVOR!

The Pursuit of Medicine
I do not have many influences in pursuing a career in medicine. There are really only two people who have deeply influenced me to pursue becoming a doctor - my uncle and my dad. Too many doctors nowadays only care about curing the patients, but do not actually care for the well-being of the patient. Television shows like House portray how the main doctor can be one who does not care about the patient, but almost always manages to cure the patient in the end. In my opinion, one of the most important characteristics that you need in order to be a successful doctor is genuine concern for the patients. Honestly, that's all there is to it. I do not have many relatives in the medical field, but ever since I was young, I have always strongly believed that a doctor should care for his or her patients.

This view was only reinforced when I visited my uncle in Korea. During my stay in Korea, I visited his workplace and when I saw what he did, I was just attracted more to becoming a doctor. We had a long discussion about my future, and I really admired my uncle and thought of him as an ideal physician. He said that being a doctor was good if you wanted to see the personal impact that you had in people's lives, but he also warned me of the failure and sorrow that I would have to face. When he talked about his profession, I could hear a genuine passion in his voice, and he was the one who first introduced me to a career in medicine.

The second experience that influenced my decision to become a doctor was when my dad had a heart attack. When he had a heart attack, I had this feeling of helplessness and all I could do was stand and watch. I hated that feeling and didn't want to go through that same feeling ever again. Then, two years later, he went through another cardiac arrest, and I was scared to death. By pursuing a medical career, I would be able to help people and maybe advance the technology behind cardiothoracic operations. I wanted to be able to save people's lives.

I made my final decision in the summer before junior year to pursue medicine. Before this, I was still unsure about my profession (although I was leaning towards a career in medicine). That summer, I went to Mexico to do missions work and my life was deeply impacted. We were out evangelizing, and we stopped by a random house because some Mexicans were motioning us over. We walked into the house, and saw a frail, old lady, who couldn't even get out of bed. I wanted to help her so much, and that's when I knew that I had to become a doctor. This was the only way that I would be able to help people like this. Even though I knew that I would not save everyone if I became a doctor, I still needed to have a hand in the person's life. I could not just stand by and watch.

After being inspired to pursue medicine, I joined science research so that I could get a taste of the medical world. I am researching myocardial infractions and am analyzing the procedures performed on patients with these cardiac problems. I can say that I am far more knowledgeable on the subject than I was before and I would definitely be interested in pursuing my research at Sophie Davis. While researching, I happened to stumble upon Dr. Trevisan's research on the prevention of cardiovascular diseases. I really admire his advancements and research in cardiovascular diseases, and would love to meet him one day.

I am also very involved in my church so I wanted to start a medical fair. I had heard about medical fairs in my friends' churches, where they asked doctors to come to their churches and give out free shots and vaccines to the church members. I contacted some doctors who attended my church, and helped to start up a medical fair. Now, there is a medical room where there is almost always a doctor giving out shots and vaccines.

The five year BS/MD program is helpful for me because I want to become a cardiothoracic surgeon as quickly as possible. My family has a lot of health issues and I want to be able to be there for them, and possibly relieve the stress in my family. I also think that a BS/MD program gives a better education because you are learning directly amongside fellow peers who are also striving to be doctors. This will help me academically and with making connections later on in life. Sophie Davis is well-known for it's BS/MD program which is why I want to go there.
Nana12 3 / 12  
Jan 8, 2012   #2
Great essay, however you need to have a stronger introduction. Make the reader bite the apple. In addition try to use better transition words, throughout your essay I felt as if you were just listing. A helpful writing technique I use, is completing rewritting an essay on the same subject, to explore new ideas. Then bring these essays together to great the final product. Try showing your passion for medicine, Universities should know what makes you different. Hope this helps. !


Home / Undergraduate / 'The Pursuit of Medicine' - Sophie Davis Essay #3
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳