Tell us what makes Stanford a good place for you.
My father has often advised me, "Dani, you will make a lot of choices in your life but more important than the choices you make is the reasoning behind them." My interest in Stanford University is not due to the "brand name" of this prestigious university, so to speak, but rather, is due to features the university offers which align with my goals.
As I entered my senior year I started to list the qualities that I wanted in a university: West Coast location, rigorous academics particularly in mathematics or pre-health professions programs, a diverse, school-spirited student body, and preparation for leadership in the post-college world. Although the University of California, Los Angeles was initially my first choice, upon closer examination and a visit to the campus I found that UCLA was not the school for me. I ended up not even applying there. Instead I found that Stanford was a much better match.
I am looking forward to meeting and learning with, as well as from, people who hail from around the globe but congregate in the Bay Area. Being taught by world-renowned professors and then retiring to a dorm with like-minded people to study for an upcoming differential calculus test or maybe crossing "the farm" to study in the Meyer library alone; these are all activities I cannot wait to partake in.
In short, Stanford is an excellent school for me because it possesses all the resources I need to become a well-rounded, globally-conscious, successful citizen of earth.
Any feedback is welcome!
You list what you want from a college, but you should probably emphasize more how Stanford offers those things for you. Emphasize what it is about Stanford that proves to you that it was much better than you thought it would be.
"In short, Stanford is an excellent school for me because it possesses all the resources I need to become a well-rounded, globally-conscious, successful citizen of earth."
Elaborate upon why it is this way for you, make the essay a bit more about Stanford. The admissions people seem to want to know why Stanford clicked so well for you.
I can't believing I'm critiquing my competition. Oh, well.
My father has often advised me, "Dani, you will make a lot of choices in your life but more important than the choices you make is the reasoning behind them."
Good start
My interest in Stanford University is not due to the "brand name" of this prestigious university, so to speak, but rather, is due to features the university offers which align with my goals.
I don't think you should have to say this. Your writing should imply enough of that.
As I entered my senior year I started to list the qualities that I wanted in a university: West Coast location, rigorous academics particularly in mathematics or pre-health professions programs, a diverse, school-spirited student body
I guess it's detailed enough
and preparation for leadership in the post-college world.
How does stanford prepare you for leadership?
Although the University of California, Los Angeles was initially my first choice, upon closer examination and a visit to the campus I found that UCLA was not the school for me.
What did you find unattractive at UCLA? and I think you can join this with the previous sentence ?
I ended up not even applying there.
I think you can take this out
Instead I found that Stanford was a much better match.
I am looking forward to meeting and learning with, as well as from, people who hail from around the globe but congregate in the Bay Area. Being taught by world-renowned professors and then retiring to a dorm with like-minded people to study for an upcoming differential calculus test or maybe crossing "the farm" to study in the Meyer library alone; these are all activities I cannot wait to partake in.
Good.
In short, Stanford is an excellent school for me because it possesses all the resources I need to become a well-rounded, globally-conscious, successful citizen of earth.
little generic, but ok
Good luck!
Pls. critique my why stanford essay,too. :)
