I just started writing- I don't know where to go with this or how to make it interesting or better-please help i am not a very good writer!!!!
As a 65 year old woman I have accomplished many things that I am proud of. I always knew I wanted to have a career making a positive difference in peoples lives. I took high school courses geared toward health care because I dreamed of traveling to Africa to provide care for those who needed it most. After graduating from high school I had a very difficult time figuring out what I would be happy doing with my life. My mother had always encouraged me to become a nurse. I did not give this much thought because my young mind told me if this was the course I chose it would be for my mother instead of a decision I made on my own. After a couple of semesters of taking classes that I was not particularly interested in I decided I must give school a break. During this time I learned a lot about what it takes to support myself and have the life I dreamed of. I began to think of all the time I spent as a child at the nursing home that employed my mother and how much I enjoyed visiting, playing games, and being around the elders who lived there. This made me realize that if I pursued a career in nursing it would not be because my mother thought I should do so, it was because I enjoyed helping people and making them feel better. Owning my decision gave me great motivation which helped me through the four year program. While in this program I became aware of the infinite possibilities of a career in nursing and realized my desire to pursue the area of adult health. Knowing that I would need experience in the skills of nursing I worked for about five years after receiving my BSN degree before I attended a graduate program with an emphasis in adult health. During that time I also became the mother of two children. I became a nurse practitioner and worked with elders for the next ten years. My autonomy and experiences told me that from there I was ready to take the next step to become a Doctor of Nursing. After finishing the doctoral program I became an educator because I felt that my knowledge and experience in nursing would be of great benefit to those persuing careers in nursing. Though I regret not making the decision to pursue a nursing career immediately after high school I have had countless incredible experiences related my profession. My education and practice formed the way I think, live and communicate.
Greetings!
You are a much better writer than you give yourself credit for! While I think it's quite good as it is, if you wanted to spice it up just a little you could employ a technique that uses a personal anecdote to draw the reader in and engage the emotions. For instance, when talking about your visits to the nursing home, you could add a touching story about a woman whose family never came to visit her, but whose life you were able to touch by reading to her and listening to stories about her childhood. Even if you have to invent most of the details, I'm sure you can draw on some real-life episodes to help you create it.
Aside from that, I have only a couple of editing tips:
a positive difference in people's lives.
I have had countless incredible experiences related to my profession.
Good job!
Thanks,
Sarah, EssayForum.com
life's valuable lessons are learned through personal experience..
hello everyone! I just need to have an introduction on this essay. Im having a hard time putting all the words..Some ideas will be a very big help..Thanks
Hello.. I can try to help you.. but where's your essay?
Jenn
Thanks! I just need something to start up, its about money. that you need to save anything that you can afford.
Do you have the rest of the essay?
Well, I wonder, personal experience rather than -- what? Book learning?
Your title made me think of the way some religions promote certain BELIEFS while other religions involve meditative practices intended to bring about a certain EXPERIENCE.
I know that you are not necessarily talking about a spiritual experience, but those ideas are the ones that came to mind for me.
Well, if it's about money and the importance of saving, you could start out with something along the lines of "Money is the root of all good." This is the reverse of the usual saying, and so will catch the readers' attention, which is what a good introductory sentence should do. Of course, you then have to segue into your topic somehow, but I leave that up to you.
