I know I still need to cut it down some but I was wanting others opinions as to if I'm going on the right track.
Prompt: Virtually all of Stanford's undergraduates live on campus. Write a note to your future roommate that reveals something about you or that will help your roommate - and us - know you better.
Dear Roommate,
I roam the plains of the panhandle state with my bison friends. Telling stories of my ancestors around the fire in our extra-large tee pee, I listen to the majestic roar of the rolling thunder creating a fearsome background noise. This story isn't heard much anymore, more like 100-200 years ago. Buffalo still are seen around here, most commonly in the Chesapeake Energy Arena; his name is Rumble and he is only seen when the forecast in Oklahoma City is a thunderstorm. Even though I am from Tulsa, it is a two hour drive by car to Oklahoma City, but nobody owns a car here, just horses, which is a four hour ride to Oklahoma City. As the thunderstorm approach more people gather around the Chesapeake Energy Arena to witness it first-hand.
This thunderstorm is an Oklahoma City Thunder basketball game. The Thunder are the first professional team to land in Oklahoma except for the WNBA's Tulsa Shock, who are hard to enjoy due to their terrible seasons. They have yet to win ten games in a 34 game season in all three years they have been here. The Thunder are the reason for the season. Every year, at least one basketball game is a must attend for me. When that day comes, I hop on my beautiful white stallion, named Ford Explorer, and ride. Once I'm there I see tons of blue and white shirts with all sorts of different sayings, such as: "fear the beard" for James Harden, a former Thunder star, "Durantula" representing Kevin Durant, Oklahoma's favorite, or plain ole "Thunder". Walking past that curtain, my adrenaline kicks in when I see those human-like aliens on the court surrounded by all this incredible technology, from the supersized scoreboard to the lights and shot clocks on the basket. My mind is blown when I envision all the electronics necessary to allow that scoreboard to be controlled by the Thunder staff in a far off area. Not to mention how incredible the lights and shot clock on the goal are by working fully automatic and simultaneously. They must be able to ignore a 225 pound creature dunking the ball while being able to sense if the ball touched the rim and not a player. While this technology is outstanding, the excitement of the game is what persuades me to buy a ticket. Watching some of the world's best basketball players do what they love and excel in their passion from a short 50 feet away is the deciding factor. So don't get scared in the middle of the night when I'm screaming at the top of my lungs "THUNDER UP!"
Hello,
I do not think it is advisable to dedicate your entire essay to the fact that you are a "Oklahoma City Thunder" fan. They want a full 360 view of who you are. From my understanding from speaking with Stanford admissions officers, this essay is really used to help match you with a roomate. Because of this, you really need to give a full overview of the THINGS that really make you - well - YOU. -AAO
Hope this helps.
