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'The satisfaction I get when I can become successful' - UCF


jbeiermeister 1 / -  
Dec 23, 2011   #1
Hello Everyone! I would love for you to review part one of my essay for University of Central Florida. thank you so much!

What qualities or unique characteristics do you possess that would allow you to contribute to the UCF community?

I feel as though the most powerful quality I obtain that will allow me to contribute to the UCF community is the ability to work as a team. At a very young age, I had found out something about myself that remains true to this day. I much prefer being on a team, and working with others, as opposed to doing things independently. I realize there are advantages to doing things by yourself, and when someone exercises their independence frequently, they often have the benefit of being in control of their own successes and outcomes. Yet the satisfaction and enjoyment I get from being a part of a team is something I feel has made me into who I am. I feel that when people are able to come together as many, and act as one, the possibilities and rewards are endless, and are easy to continue. I believe my attitude towards working with people is a strength that I was able to find in myself at such a young age. The satisfaction I get when I can become successful with many other people with whom want the same things as me, is heightened even more, knowing that I was able to make something positive happen for others as well. If I were to be accepted into the University of Central Florida, I would use this quality to bring my peers together, and build a stronger community.
yobobo 2 / 3  
Dec 23, 2011   #2
Hi
Hm generally good. I suggest you can use one specific example to support ur belief. I quickly scanned through ur essays...Hmm not sure whether what I changed r correct so dun take them unless u agree to them. All the best =)

I feel as though the most powerful quality I obtain that will allow me to contribute to the UCF community is the ability to work as a team. At a very young age, I have found out something about myself that remains true to this day. I much prefer being on a team, and working with others, as opposed to doing things independently. I realize there are advantages to doing things by yourself, and when someone exercises their independence frequently, they often have the benefit of being in control of their own successes and outcomes. Yet the satisfaction and enjoyment I get from being a part of a team is something I feel has made me into who I am. I feel that when people are able to come together as one as many, and act as one, the possibilities and rewards are endless, and are easy to continue. I believe my attitude towards working with people is a strength that I was able to find in myself at such a young age. The satisfaction I get when I can become successful with many other people with whom want the same things as me, is heightened even more, knowing that I was able to make something positive happen for others as well. If I am accepted into the University of Central Florida, I will use this quality to bring my peers together, and build a stronger community.


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