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My School; Brown Community - Pick any community and tell us why it's important!


bg32 2 / 4  
Dec 25, 2013   #1
We all exist within communities or groups of various sizes, origins, and purposes; pick one and tell us why it is important to you, and how it has shaped you.

I decided to write about my school...

A small but distinct example of multicultural students all gathered in less than an acre, is my second home, The Buckley School. I entered this community at the age of 13 and felt not only accepted but also welcomed by my friends, teachers, and administrators. It was a microscopic example of Los Angeles, where people from all over the world are congregated. I was very happy to see how we as students would interact with each other in classes and express a cohesive interest in knowledge. I will never forget the depth of the discussions my freshman year in Ancient World History when we would discuss all religions and their pillars. One valuable lesson I learned is to listen and respect the opinions of others, because the way we were each raised constitutes our unique perceptions of the world. I hope to carry this experience of thinking outside the box and collaborating with others, from my high school to college and later in life.
dumi 1 / 6,925 1592  
Dec 25, 2013   #2
A small but distinct example of multicultural students all gathered in less than an acre, is my second home, The Buckley School.

.... I like if you have a slight change in the organization of words;
A small, but distinct example of multicultural students all gathered in less than an acre, is the Buckley School, my second home.

I entered this community at the age of 13 and felt not only accepted but also welcomed by my friends, teachers, and administrators.

I joined this community at the age of thirteen and enjoyed the warm welcome and acceptance by my peers, teachers and even administrators.
Well, I feel you have not adequately responded to this;

tell us why it is important to you, and how it has shaped you

That is where the whole focus is and you've got to answer that!
OP bg32 2 / 4  
Dec 25, 2013   #3
I definitely understand what your saying. I will try to revise it


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