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"Science has always intrigued me" - Why the Pratt School of Engineering


Viperstrik 1 / 1  
Dec 28, 2010   #1
If you are applying to the Pratt School of Engineering, please discuss why you want to study engineering and why you would like to study at Duke. (Three paragraphs.) Can someone please give me some feedback on this essay? Any help would be appreciated :)

Science has always intrigued me. At a young age, astronomy took a hold of me. I was mystified by the way the stars twinkled in the sky and how these beautiful stars could turn into a powerful black hole. When I reached high school I because interested in all aspects of science; I was able to further my thirst for knowledge by taking AP Biology. This course gave me a basic foundation of how life worked. I gained a better understanding of the intertwining connections between organisms in nature. But this input of knowledge wasn't enough. This class expanded my view of the world as well as my interest in science. I took the next two sciences classes available: AP Chemistry and AP Physics. Chemistry allowed me to observe how life worked at a subatomic scale and Physics opened my eyes to the ways different forces interact with one another.

There was always something new to learn in the field of science; a tiny clue that leads to a new discovery. I loved to do research. Every lab day in my science courses brought excitement. It was an opportunity to unearth something new. The true beauty of it was that it felt as though I was the one discovering it. It was with my hands and brains that I was able uncover a new discovery. Submerging my mind in an atmosphere of constant discovery and being able to interact with minds with similar interests to mine will allow me to further expand my knowledge of science. My dream is to become a biomedical engineer and to use my thirst for knowledge to help people in need. I love the ability to apply my knowledge to real life situations. I enjoyed my physics class because I was able to utilize my knowledge of forces to determine solve unknowns such as the acceleration of a car if it's moving at a certain initial velocity or the thrust of a rocket if given the normal force.

I have researched many universities and I have found that Duke's Pratt School of Engineering would be perfect for me. I'm a very strong math and science student. I have taken the highest levels of math and science courses available to me, not only because I like to take advantage of all the learning opportunities given to me, but because I enjoy learning about those subjects. Duke has one of the most prestigious Biomedical Engineering Programs in the nation and has so much to give its students. I would love to take part in Duke's Hart Fellows Program because it would allow me to experience the hardships of people in socially problematic countries. This would open my eyes to the world's global issues. I hope to use my knowledge as a biomedical engineer to develop solutions that will help improve the lives of others in less prosperous countries. Duke University would give me more opportunities to learn, explore, and discover about the world than I could ever imagine.
calvinhmw 9 / 21  
Dec 28, 2010   #2
But this input of knowledge wasn't enough. This class expanded my view of the world as well as my interest in science.

how about:
Although this class expanded my view of the world as well as my interest in science, this input of knowledge wasn't enough.
OP Viperstrik 1 / 1  
Dec 28, 2010   #3
Thanks that flows way better!


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