Stanford students possess an intellectual vitality. Reflect on an idea or experience that has been important to your intellectual development. (2000 characters)
Trying to contain my tears, I watched the documentary on Al Jazeera news channel about a two year old Palestinian boy named Muhammad who died minutes before his medication could reach him. The Israeli government didn't permit him to leave the strip for medical care, not until after two years of hard labor for his father to obtain a one day visa. Muhammad reached Tel Aviv too late. I was taken aback, it reminded of my roots of my strenuous journey from Afghanistan to the land of the free. I had to go through a similar journey to get to where I am today. Fortunately unlike Muhammad I was able to escape to freedom or better said to my savior. At that instance I knew that I needed to do something to prevent such differences, rob the lives of thousands of helpless children.
I began a frenzied search for career paths that would help make a difference in lives such as baby Muhammad's. But, I soon realized I do not have to specialize in any career to aid children in need. I could start with what I have now. I created a website for a school history day project about the Israel Palestine conflict to help spread the word about children such as Muhammad. My friends were outraged and had no idea that conflicts such as these existed in other parts of the world. This enabled me to truly value the freedom that I now have in America and reflect on my life valuing each day a little bit more. Batman's quote best represents my feelings now: "It's not who I am underneath, but what I do that defines me."
I like the answer you gave to this question, you definitely went into an idea/experience that has been important to your intellectual development. I found a few grammatical errors, like the comma in the last sentence of your paragraph doesn't need to be there but should go after the word "fortunately" and "Muhammad" in your second to last sentence in the same paragraph. Really I would say just check your comma placement. Other than that, I like it.