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My second family - Rice cultural perspective essay

calypso14 1 / -  
Dec 31, 2016   #1
Rice cultural perspective essay - does it make sense? needs to be scholarly.

Rice means a success in the future

Throughout the years, I have become considerate of how important a person's culture is to their development as a person. Each culture has its own specific traditions, teachings, and customs. For me, being brought up by two parents who come from a strong Brazilian background definitely had an impact on how my personal perspective in life would develop.

Growing up, my parents constantly stressed the importance of togetherness. At Brazilian family reunions here in America or in Brazil, I always felt the presence of a uniting force at hand. Brazilians are born with the ability to make even an outsider feel like family. Due to my parent's tradition of being a close knit family, I began to carry around the appreciation of how vital it is to stick together with those who bring out the best in you. At Rice, I would be most excited to find and unite with my potential second family; a family that would be made up of intelligent peers who push each other to only improve. Peers that I could collaborate with and contribute to, because of my undiscovered personal philosophy. I would be able to introduce new ways of thinking to Rice's academic field.

Each individual has a divergent way of thinking, therefore, my way of thinking and solving problems may seem so foreign to other minds. There is no one copy of each us and because of this, our brains are so singular. With an agglomeration of unique minds at Rice, I could help add on to that diversity. My intellect includes out-of-the-box thinking strategies, ambitions, and observation skills. With the help of more than a thousand personal perspectives, Rice would be able to expand its infinite knowledge by discovering new reasonings that can be applied to many issues for a hope of multiple unveiled solutions.

So many parts of my personal perspective relate directly back to the traits of my parents and family members. Since a child, I was encouraged to be positive, thoughtful and productive. At Rice, I could contribute to the life of my peers by adding positivity to their lives through my ability to only find the good in even the most devastating situations. My thoughtfulness would also be present in the Rice community due to my inherent trait to prioritize the needs of others above my own for the hope of improvement. Lastly, I would advocate for those around me to adopt the characteristic of being productive so that we always finished what we started and never gave up when running after our dreams. I hope to ingrain others with what I have learned from the Brazilian culture. At Rice, I would like students to see through my figurative Brazilian-American eyes so that they would be able to see everyday issues with a new approach. In my eyes life at Rice is seen with positive future for success but not for just certain individuals, for the university as a whole.

Thank you, happy 2017! I wish all the best.
Hi! this is a rough draft tell me if it makes sense, sometimes it only makes sense in my eyes! any ideas welcome. GRAMMAR HELP NEEDED, i might have a lot of mistakes!

rnsnz18 10 / 33 4  
Dec 31, 2016   #2
Firts I would like to suggest you to restructure the introduction, all sentences seem kind of cliche that many the reader will see thousands of times. It's good but try to be a little more unique, your second paragraph it's really good. But the third one I feel that you add more charasteristics of yourself that don't have a proof with a background story, try to say an experience that show how you acquire those perspectives. Finally, try to mention Rice specific comments, special things offered at Rice that will get benefited by your perspective, not only general things that you could bring to everywhere.

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