This is my rough draft for my common app essay. the intro and conclusion really aren't complete. it needs a lot of work i think...
It started as an English assignment my junior year. My teacher handed out thin paperbound books of essays and assigned us Self-Reliance by Ralph Waldo Emerson. By the fourth sentence, I was captivated:"To believe your own thought, to believe that what is true for you in your private heart is true for all men, - that is genius." Emerson spoke to me. The concept was almost a cliché; trust yourself, but suddenly it rang true. I wanted to stop doubting myself; I wanted to act more self-reliant.
Quickly, I learned that reading Self-Reliance itself would not and did not change me. I woke up that next morning the same person, with the same insecurities and mind-set. It was the beginning to a new approach.
The basis of self reliance, as explained by Emerson, is self acceptance: "Accept the place the divine providence has found for you, the society of your contemporaries, the connection of events." To be self-reliant meant first I had to accept what was out of my control. When I was five years old, my neighbor and friend died in an alcohol related accident. Emerson shed new light on this tragic event in my life. With the help of time, I came to accept what happened, the past, the random connection of events, the recklessness of the drunk-driver, as it was out of my control. My thoughts turned away from anger and confusion to wondering what was in my control, what would a self-reliant individual do.
The answer came in the form of a club. Junior year, I was offered a position on the board of directors of Safe Rides, a student run organization that provides rides home as an alternative to drunk driving. I took Emerson's advice "to detect and watch that gleam of light which flashes across [the] mind from within", and accepted the offer. I trusted my initial inclination before I let other people's ideas warp my mind.
Immediately people began to express their doubt in my judgments. When I told my mom of my leadership position on Safe Rides, she scorned my decision. "Safe Rides enables drinking." she argued adamantly, "Why would you want to support drinking?" This new thought lingered in my mind. Even some of my friends discouraged me from Safe Rides, reminding me of all the weekend nights I would have to give up. I considered these discouraging words but Self-Reliance rung louder. I had no control of the past, Becky's death, but I did have some control of the future, my decisions. I stood by safe rides, for I believed I could have an impact on the future.
The ultimate test of self-reliance is in actions. My thoughts would be useless if I did not have the courage to act on them. I became the team leader of a group of student volunteers that shared my concerns about drunk driving. On assigned weekends, I coordinate with the drivers, navigators and dispatchers to assure that everyone who calls for a ride is picked up and driven home safely. As a senior, I have continued to be a team leader for Safe Rides. Every ride we provide could be a life we are saving.
Acting self-reliant, finally I feel as if I have some control of the navigation of my life. My internalized beliefs have come out in my actions.
Quickly, I learned that reading Self-Reliance itself, would not and did not change me.
To be self-reliant meant that first I had to accept what was out of my control.
In becoming self-reliant, I finally feel as if I have some control of the navigation of my life. My internalized beliefs have come out in my actions.
I think you might only need a couple more sentences at the end, telling how relying on yourself, and following your heart have helped you in some other area (s).
:)
