As I was sitting in Washington Square Park, surrounded by radiant students, I immediately felt at home. All I could think about was taking part in this open and diverse community that would let me share my background and allow me to blossom into an independent and open-minded person. Moreover, NYU's thriving location brings many opportunities I'm looking for (internships, cultural development...) which are emphasized by NYU New York's non-traditional campus that offers a unique and prestigious learning experience involving lecturers that encourage an open interaction. I will be immersed into a welcoming community as soon as I step outside the classroom.
you have to say how will this affect you in the long run.
I'm guessing that this is one of those essays with a very limited character/word count so you were trying to get as much information down as possible. My advice would be to hone in on specifics about the campus. I see this type of question as your chance to show off your knowledge of the school. If you give only vague, "it has the majors I want", the school won't be very impressed. Cite specific club names, internships, maybe even a student help committee. Highlight anything that you find interesting that will make the college take note that you do know your stuff about the campus and about the curriculum.
Your answer is good.
As I was sitting in Washington Square Park, surrounded by radiant students, I immediately felt at home.
I think you can shorten or cancell this sentence to have more space tell how the courses and curriculums attract you.