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Something thay didn't go according the plan

rnsnz18 10 / 33 4  
Jan 2, 2017   #1
This my essay for the MIT essay: Tell us about a challenge you faced or something important that didn't go according to the plan. How did you manage the situation?(250 words limit)

an unexpected incident taught me responsibility

"Did you have trouble with the permission?" one of my friends asked while we were traveling to Mexico City. I had no idea what he was talking about. Then he explained that I had to get my parents sign me a statement along with other documents to leave the country without them. We arrived to the airport four hours before the schedule time of our flight to Thailand, but I didn't know if it was going to be enough time to get the documents ready. My parents were 800 miles away from Mexico City.

I was doing everything at the last minute. I searched on mailing services and posted on Facebook asking if anyone was coming in a flight from Delicias to Mexico within the next hours. Fortunately one friend answered and my parents gave him the statement signed. When he arrived I immediately went to the immigration service to get my permission sealed but then realized I had my passport copy missing. In a race against time I searched for a copy machine in the entire airport but found every office closed. I had to run ten blocks to get the copy from a stationery store. Finally, I entered the departure gate to find out the flight had been delayed one hour.

Since that incident, I make sure to do everything within the specified time and double or even triple-check if all is correct. I learned the significance of responsibility and now I apply it in everything I do.

A Mit student told me that it is better to focus on the situatuon rather than emphasize more on a later experience were I used the learning from that experience. I try to give the idea of how irresponsible I was by sentences like "at the last minute" or when i say i had the copy missing. I focus more kn something important that didn't go according to the plan to focus on the things i did to manage that situation, maybe my conclusion isn't that great about conveying the responsibility i have now. I only have 250 words and have read to use that space on the failure more than in the lesrning.

NickNack 2 / 2 1  
Jan 2, 2017   #2
I like how you were irresponsible and you learned from it. You should mention why you were going to Thailand. Like why was this flight so important? Also, name another important event that made you responsible since you learned from this. For example, like I never missed an interview with important documents and how you prepared for it. I hope this helped.
OP rnsnz18 10 / 33 4  
Jan 2, 2017   #3
Thank you for your suggestion, in other part of the application i mentioned that i traveled to the IMO (intl math olympiad) thay was hosted in thailand so i think that shows the importance of the trip, i didn't want to waste space saying it again. I will work on you other suggedtion, thank you very much
Holt [Contributor] - / 9,017 2713  
Jan 2, 2017   #4
You should develop the problem and the lesson learned in an equal manner. One cannot be more important than the other. Regardless of what your friend told you, you have to create a balanced essay. Keep in mind that the reviewer that liked his essay will not be the same reviewer who will review your paper. The considerations will be different for you. So do not rely on the experiences of others or their instructions when developing your essay. In an essay that asks for 2 responses, the importance given is 50/50. Therefore, your concluding statement should be made stronger and develop more discussion of how you apply the lesson learned to your current endeavors. The essay has a good premise but lacks in development. Address the parts that need improvement and the essay should be good to go once that is done.

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