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Spectrum of the biochemical field; Cornell / Why agriculture and life science?

ayu0006 8 / 17 2  
Dec 31, 2012   #1
College of Agriculture and Life Sciences:
How have your interests and related experiences influenced the major you have selected in the College of Agriculture and Life Sciences?

The biology field is diverse and so it is only normal that I falter on to which facet I should endeavor towards. However these dazes I possess on which life science aspect invoke interest soon unveils itself.

It is 7:15 pm and I am at my nutrition and dietetics lecture. Palm sweating, fingers wearied, hand trembling. I place my pen on the school desk and swirl my hand round and round. Quickly I take hold of the pen again and resume taking notes. I pay no care to further strains. All I hear is "Carbohydrates fulfill energy needs and influence protein shapes, functions and cell communication. It is responsible for keeping your digestive system, nervous system and brain fit" All that is processed in my brain all is a "Whoa really?! Carbohydrates are currently fueling my brain and permit this information to dissolve within me! Science-ception!" I continue to jot down the notes zealously. "Lipids has a diversity of functions which includes energy storage, fuel for muscles, insulation...." No way. "Proteins are working and structural molecules. They are categorized as the building block of life...." Stop it, get outta of town!!

As I wait on the platform for the 6 train to arrive and I stand by the bus stop for the Q15 bus all I can hear are vivid bits of what my professor was saying. I keep on rerunning these scenes over and over again, feeling crazed. Nothing has ever captured my interest like this before. Still my excitement is brought to a standstill when I am unable to pinpoint the focal point of it all. As the pieces came together, it is biochemistry that I love and crave for. I love it when I am able to understand the vital role the various biomolecules play into the everyday life or how we are constantly remolding our body discreetly. This whole cycle is simply a beautiful sight. But I wish to experiment with it; I wish to apply these concepts to modern medicine to explore possible ways in crafting certain medication that pertains to the obese, diabetics and protein deficient and to derive upon current medication usage and enhance them by applying my knowledge.

Even with my interest kindled, my drive for biochemistry seems to plateau. My growth and passion is stifled. I do not have the sufficient resources to help me cultivate my interest. So through the Cornell Life Science program I look forward to undergoing intense and intellectual nourishment. I wish to be presented with challenges of independent research the university encourages students to participate in. Through these experiences, I wish to mature as a scientific thinker and writer as well as obtaining greater sets of skills to be able to strive for the Biology Scholars Program. With these priceless opportunities Cornell offers, it will refine my knowledge and push me slowly up to the spectrum of the biochemical field. .

alicederp 10 / 56 4  
Dec 31, 2012   #2
Hi there,

First thing is your essay has amazing flow and structure. I wish I can write like you...

Anyway, I think it's great but the one problem I have with this essay is that the colloquial language used in the second paragraph makes your interest seem fake. Like it's a bit over the top if you know what I mean.

That's all. I hope I helped!

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