i am currently at 745 words, and i'm trying to get it down to 580. the limit is 500, but i figure a few extra words wont hurt me too bad.
also any edits, feedback or critique will be helpful, thanks.
my summer at boot camp
There is no easy way to tell your child you're sending them to boot camp. That's why, for the majority of the 8 ˝ hour drive down to Connelly Springs, North Carolina, my dad chose to keep his mouth shut. Even when he dropped me off, instead of saying things like "I love you" and "you'll be ok, I promise," he simply signed and handed off the rest of the waivers/ a check, nodded off to me, climbed back in his truck and drove away. And that is how my summer at The About Face Boot Camp June 2011 had begun.
After all that had happened that year-losing my mom to cancer, being at constant odds with my strict father and getting backstabbed by a lot of people who I thought were my friends, I thought I had finally lost everything I stood for. I had hit rock bottom. I thought that, if I dropped dead, it wouldn't even matter. I felt that everything had been taken from me, as if things had gotten as bad as they possibly get. I felt despondent, hopeless and abandoned. But more than anything, I felt completely alone.
Camp was a lot like vacationing in hell. It was like being in jail, except manual labor and arduous exercise were required, sleeping in tents was protocol, and instead of bright orange jumpsuits, our uniforms were these abysmal gray shirt and pant sets that were great for showing off the sweat stains we acquired from all the heat. It was always hot. Always. The amount of time we spent in the sun helped us cadets take the farmer's tan look to a whole new level. We spent most of our time working like dogs in the hot sun, cutting tall grass with swing blades, weeding the edges of the camp fence and cleaning the outhouses. We ran around 12 miles a day. They barely fed us-the fly covered slop and the stale PB & J sandwiches served as essential parts of our nutritious camp diets. The camp director, Mr. Moses, was the epitome of terror. He was a war veteran with a thick southern accent-imagine a meaner, slightly shorter Vin Diesel with a chewing tobacco habit, a beer gut and a bum leg. Punishments were severe for anyone out of line, and some of the most unruly and rambunctious kids were broken in within a matter of days.
It was unlike anything I'd ever endured. Every day was a challenge, and each new challenge made it harder for me not to want to give up. Physically, I had been taken to limits unrivaled by any soccer conditioning I'd experienced in my past -mentally I had to fight every last bitter, disparaging thought that crossed my mind. I would often lie awake in my tent crying and feeling sorry for myself, blubbering "why me" and wondering if camp would ever end.
But each day I fought to stay emotionally stable, I became stronger. Determination replaced tears, and hope replaced dejection. Slowly, my indignation faded, and toughing out my stay became less of a burden. I thought that if I could just find it within myself to take each task head on, hour by hour, day by day that my stay at camp would be over as fast as it had begun.
And by the time that it was all over, I was able to realize something important. Now I won't tell you that what I learned is some variation on that annoyingly-appropriate-but-profusely-overused cliché - "when life gives your lemons, make lemonade" because it's about much more than that. While that is important, trying to do that is easier said than done, especially when you feel as lost and hopeless as I did. Rather, what I learned was to stop making myself the victim. I realized that you can't allow the limitations of your situation to take your happiness away from you, because that in itself can keep you from pulling through and moving forward. Life is short-losing my mom that year assured me of that fact. So allowing your mind to spend its energy wallowing in self-pity yourself is a complete waste of existence. Instead, heighten your sense of adaptability, accept things as they are, and keep working towards a better future. That's the only way we can fight life's hardest battles and come out strong in the end.
