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Stanford Supplement: the Brew Bar


etron 5 / 17  
Aug 6, 2011   #1
Hey everyone, I'm working on my early decision Stanford essays and was wondering if this one would fit better under "Stanford students possess an intellectual vitality. Reflect on an idea or experience that has been important to your intellectual development," or "What matters to you, and why?"

This is the idea and I want to expand on it and connect it better to the prompts. Any suggestions or advice would be greatly appreciated! :)

Last November, my family launched the Brew Bar, a Hawaiian coffee and chocolate booth at the Haleiwa Farmer's Market on O'ahu. We hoped to put the proceeds from the Brew Bar toward my sister's and my college fund. Since I am pining for Stanford, I saw this as an excellent way to show those Stanford admission folks that I mean business (pun intended). Over the last eight months, my sister and I received a whirlwind business education, found a community that made us feel at home, and learned the magnificent art of selling, buying, and promoting Waialua Estates' Hawaiian coffee and chocolate. Prior to founding the Brew Bar, I wouldn't have thought a subject as vague as "Business" could even hold my attention, let alone inspire and intrigue me. To my surprise, business drew me right in; I became the cofounder, manager, cashier, and business development coordinator at the Brew Bar. As the weeks flew by, I was happy to discover I had a knack for pinpointing potential sales, predicting customer preferences, and sealing deals simply by looking at someone. I also learned the importance of buying and selling local products. Each Sunday, I meet amazing people-locals, tourists, marathon runners, vendors, international adventurers, musicians, college students and professors-who stop to buy, learn about our products, and hear our story. The market and its visitors have helped me on my journey to receiving a higher education, (paying for it), building a community, and getting a fun, home-grown business education.
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Aug 11, 2011   #2
Intellectual vitality.

This is not really about things that are IMPORTANT to you. Business is a means to an end. :-)
It will be great if you can, in your discussion of this exploit, mention some comparable endeavor that is going on at Stanford... something that you can connect it to. What can you do to make a connection with Stanford and then also with your career aspiration? The applicant with the detailed vision of the future is the most impressive. How can you make this essay reflect your seriousness about a plan you are carrying out?


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